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Thursday, August 9, 2018

Greetings Laff Lovers,

Interestingly enough, I just read that humans are one of the rare animals which copulate face to face. The only other species to do so with the same regularity as humans is orangutans.

Well, no God-damned orangutan is going to make a monkey out of me. Tonight I am going home and fucking my wife doggie style.



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I was absolutely disgusted after I accidentally clicked on some gay porn last night. It was the worst 40 minutes of my life!


Millions of people worldwide have fallen for the 40-40-40 scam.

The 40-40-40 scam is where you make someone else RICH by working 40 hours a week for 40 years, and then try to retire on 40 percent of what you couldn't afford to live off in the first place.

Commonly known as a job.

Condoms don't guarantee safe sex anymore. A friend of mine was wearing one when he was shot by his girlfriend's husband.

John O'Reilly hoisted his beer and said, "Here's to spending the rest of me Life, between the legs of me wife!"

That won him the top prize at the pub for the best toast of the night!

He went home and told his wife, Mary, "I won the prize for the Best toast of the night."

She said, "Aye, did ye now. And what was your toast?"

John said, "Here's to spending the rest of me life, sitting in church beside me wife."

"Oh, that is very nice indeed, John!" Mary said.

The next day, Mary ran into one of John's drinking buddies on the street corner. The man chuckled leeringly and said, "John won the prize the other night at the pub with a toast about you, Mary."

She said, "Aye, he told me, and I was a bit surprised myself. You know, he's only been in there twice in the last four years. Once I had to pull him by the ears to make him come and the other time he fell asleep."