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Saturday, July 28, 2018

Greetings fellow Bizarros:

With all of the dangerous synthetic drugs out there like bath salts, crystal meth, and Molly to name a few, some seekers of expanded consciousness are turning to a more natural means. A much more natural means.

Wildlife officials in Arizona said toads are being stolen from a conservation area and the thieves are believed to be planning to lick them.

The Spur Cross Conservation Area's official Facebook page posted footage showing multiple people taking Sonoran desert toads late at night.

The post said the case has been turned over to the Maricopa County Sheriff's Office to seek charges including violation of the park's posted hours and vandalism.

Randy Babb, an Arizona Game and Fish wildlife biologist, said the thieves were likely planning to lick the toads, a practice that induces hallucinogenic effects similar to DMT.

"Sonoran desert toads are the toads of choice and they harvest the poison from the and then ingest it," Babb said. "They're the largest toad in the Southwest. They can reach sizes of more than 2 pounds and can live up to 20 years."


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The aftermath of a McDonald's meal often isn't pretty, but if you have to strip naked when you go to the bathroom maybe you should find another restaurant to visit. But that was probably NOT the reason police found a naked man doing jumping jacks in the women's bathroom of a McDonald's in Tennessee. Police were summoned to a McDonald's in Nashville due to a "male subject who was locked in the womens restroom naked," according to a court affidavit. Restaurant management reported that the man had "been there all day." [Sounds like someone had the Double Bacon Smokehouse Burger.] A patrolman reported encountering Brody Young, 25, in the bathroom. Young was "erratic and doing jumping jacks and hitting the wall," reported the cop, who noted a strong chemical odor in the bathroom, evidence that the intoxicated Young had likely been huffing. Deemed a "danger to himself and others," Young was taken into custody and charged with several misdemeanors. He has been barred from entering the McDonald's.


Who Needs a Gun When You Have a Pressure Washer?

A New Jersey teenager fended off a man armed with a knife who tried to rob him by spraying the bandit in the face with a power washer, authorities said. The teen was in his driveway about 2:45 p.m. when the robber approached him with a folding pocket knife, police said in a statement. The robber then fled through neighboring yards after getting a face full of water. Police said he was wearing a dark hooded sweatshirt, black gloves and dark colored long shorts or pants. He is white, about 5-foot-10 with a medium build, in his early 20s, and has a freshly power washed face.

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LEWIS; I bet that kitty-cat Sweet Tart elected mayor of Omena, Michigan would probably be a better president than our current shmegeggi in chief Trump AKA Commander Covfefe. -R.S.
[One thing is for sure, there wouldn't be any tariffs on tuna or cat nip.]

It shouldn't be surprising that a mountain lion found a warm, soft spot to take a nap for a few hours. A mountain lion is still a cat, and anybody who knows cats knows that they have an instinct for that kind of thing. I'm glad the woman didn't call animal control to torture the poor thing. We take up enough of their habitat. The least we can do is share a little bit of ours.

Are you sure the guy arrested at the health club was naked? I have seen some women wearing such skin-tight workout pants that they might as well be naked. When you can see labia - your pants are too tight. Maybe he was just wearing skin-tone stretchy pants.

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