THE DAILY GROANER - August 1, 2018
Good Morning Groanies,
I must admit something, you know, to purge myself of the guilt. Actually, I'll admit to a few things. Okay, here it goes...
Sometimes, in a moment of desperation, I use the microwave to dry some of my laundry; usually socks and underwear. I sometimes got to PetSmart and pretend I have a dog. Oh, and I take a single penny to the bank and ask the teller to break it and when the teller says that it's not possible I say, "That's the last time I listen to him. I knew that penny didn't make any cents."
I feel so much better now. Thanks for listening. Now, I'm off to make some nuke some socks and get some squeak toys for nobody.
P.S. Did you miss an issue? You can read every issue from the Gophercentral library of newsletters on our exhaustive archives page. Thousands of issues, all of your favorite publications in chronological order. You can read AND comment. Just click GopherArchives
Jokes? Comments? Questions? Email Steve
*-- Can We Have A Word? --*
Husband: Do you know that on an average women says between 10,000 to 35,000 words a day?
Wife: Yes, that's because they have to repeat everything often to men.
*-- Calling Off --*
A phone call came to a school.
Caller: My daughter can't come to school today.
School Secretary: Alright, but what's the relation between you and the student?
Caller: This is my mother speaking.
*-- Q and A Quickies --*
Q: Did you hear about that new broom?
A: It's sweeping the nation!
Q: What stays in the corner and travels all over the world?
A: A stamp.
Missed an Issue? Visit the Daily Groaner Archives