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Wednesday, July 25, 2018

Greetings fellow Bizarros:

If you live in a rural area there are certain risks you have to be willing to face. Occasionally interacting with wildlife is one of them. Unfortunately a lot of people panic when faced with an animal they can't put a tiny, little sweater on, and immediately call professionals to come tranquilize or even murder it.

But one Oregon woman used her experience with energy healing to safely deal with an unexpected and dangerous house guest.

When Lauren Taylor got home late one night last week she was met with an unusual surprise; a pair of yellow-brown eyes staring at her from behind the couch. Those eyes belonged to a wild mountain lion.

Apparently, the back door had been left open, and the cat had wandered right in after drinking from a fountain in the yard.

Taylor, who has previously worked in wildlife rescue and also practices energy healing, knew they'd have to give the cat a lot of space and remain calm to encourage her to leave safely. Taylor saw the lion lie down, so she quietly went outside to keep watch through the window.

To her surprise, the lion was fast asleep.

"The lion was frightened, agitated and determined to exit through a closed window," Taylor wrote on Facebook. "Once the energy shifted, she calmed down."

As the minutes passed on, and Taylor remained outside, the lion continued to sleep. Eventually she woke up and noticed the human staring in at her. Taylor began blinking slowly at her - which in feline body language signifies that you pose no threat.

Taylor remained outside for nearly six more hours as the lion continued napped behind the couch.

It was just a couple hours until dawn before the lion finally got up and calmy left through an open door.

"I am hopeful and confident this cougar will not be back," Taylor said. "It was a perfect ending to a blessed encounter that could have been dangerous if approached from a lower frequency [of energy]. May she stay safely in the hills to enjoy a long life as a wild and healthy lion."


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*------ Naked Man Arrested at Health Club ------*

A Massachusetts man was arrested at a New Hampshire Planet Fitness after he did naked yoga on the public gym floor. When police apprehended 34-year-old Eric Stagno, he reportedly told them he thought the health club was a "judgement free zone," referring to the gym franchise's marketing slogan. Stagno was allegedly naked when he used the gym's yoga mats. [Aren't those mats gross enough?] "The story we got from witnesses was that the guy walked in, stripped down right there in front, left the clothes and belongings at the front desk, walked back and forth across the gym a couple of times and then settled in over at the yoga mats," Plaistow police Capt. Brett Morgan told the New Hampshire Union-Leader. Morgan told WBZ-TV that gymgoers who witnessed Stagno nude routine said they felt "disgusted," "sick" and "unsafe." Stagno was released on a $1,000 bail.


*-- Cat Takes Office as Mayor of Michigan Town --*

A Michigan village inaugurated its fourth-ever mayor to paw-ffice: A local cat named Sweet Tart. The Village of Omena voted the 9-year-old feline, who previously served as the village's vice mayor, into office in an election that featured votes being cast via $1 donations that went to the local historical society. "While I'm home schooled, I graduated first in my class!" Sweet Tart's campaign profile boasted. Officials said there were a record number of votes in the election, which featured a variety of animal candidates. The village has had an animal mayor for more than a decade. There were about 7,000 votes cast, including several online. Sweet Tart's opponents in the race, which included 13 dogs, a peacock, a goat, a chicken and another cat, were all awarded positions on the village council. Sweet Tart will serve as mayor until the next election in 2021, officials said.

*-------------- READER COMMENTS --------------*

Re: Jesus quote, I had heard the words camel and rope are similar in the Book of Matthew's original language and whoever translated it into English made a mistake. Rope makes more sense. If this is true, it's one of the most oft-repeated mistakes in history (along with "You can't have your cake and eat it too." It should, of course, be "You can't EAT your cake and HAVE it too.")

Lewis, it's RITE of passage, not RIGHT. Quite a difference there. Otherwise, keep up the good work.
[You're quite rite.]

My question is; why did the dad leave $20k where his son could get at it? Especially since he apparently knew his son 'had a drug problem and owes people thousands of dollars.' Has he never heard of safe deposit boxes? Of course, I guess a safe is basically a giant safety deposit box, but I guess if you give a kid a drug problem and access to 20,000 bucks, he's gonna learn how to use an acetylene torch. Lesson learned.

*----------- END OF READER COMMENTS ----------*