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Wednesday, July 11, 2018

Greetings fellow Bizarros:

It takes a lot of guts, not to mention a lot of dementia, to carry an axe into a convenience store and start swinging at people's heads. It takes even more guts to plead "not guilty" when there is surveillance video of you carrying out the attacks. But that is exactly what this young woman did at a trial in Sydney, Australia.

The incident happened last year, early in the morning at a 7-Eleven in a suburb of Sydney. An outside camera shows 26-year-old Evie Amati strolling across the parking lot carrying the axe. An interior camera shows her wandering the aisles while a man and woman shop.

At the register the video even shows the man, Ben Rimmer, talking to Amati and gesturing to the axe. You can't hear what is said, but you can imagine it going something like, "What the hell's with the axe?"

Mr. Rimmer then does something beyond understanding; he turns his back on a strange woman carrying an axe in a convenience store at 2 in the morning.

Ms. Amati doesn't waste the opportunity and winds up for a vicious swing which catches Rimmer across the side of his face sending him crashing to the floor.

She then turns on the woman, Sharon Hacker, who is halfway out of the door, and hits her from behind. Hacker also falls to the ground and Amati takes another swing at her before walking calmly out of the store.

While there is no video of it, a third man narrowly avoided getting hit by Amati on the street outside by using his backpack as a shield.

Rimmer was left with a laceration across his face and a fractured nose and cheek. Hacker suffered a fractured skull.

Amati has pleaded not guilty to six charges, including two of wounding or causing grievous bodily harm with intent to murder, with her barrister arguing she was experiencing a mental illness at the time.

Yeah, that'll probably work.

You can look the video up for yourself. It's pretty brutal.


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*------------ Stab-Proof Vest Isn't ------------*

A young British man was stabbed to death after mistakenly believing that the jacket he was wearing was "stab proof." 22-year-old Jordan Easton was sitting in the kitchen of a friend's house when he decided to try out his protective vest. Easton grabbed a knife and plunged it into the vest. Sadly, he realized that the vest did not live up to its promise, Assistant Medical Examiner Karin Welsh said recently during a court hearing. Easton was quickly taken to the hospital, where he died from a single stab wound to the chest. The injuries were determined to be self-inflicted, but there was no evidence that Easton intentionally tried to hurt himself. Friends described Easton, who had turned 22-year-old five days before he died, as a man with a "heart of gold." Easton's death was ruled as a "misadventure" meaning that he did not have the intention to cause his own death.


*--------------- Drunk Seagulls ----------------*

Animal rescuers in Britain said they have noted an uptick in calls to rescue "drunk" seagulls that apparently got into brewery waste. RSPCA officers Jo Daniel, Clara Scully and Paul Adams said they have responded to more than a dozen calls in recent weeks about gulls exhibiting the same intoxication symptoms. "We have had a number of these come through over the last couple of weeks," Daniel said. "We think they're gaining access to some brewing waste products somewhere. At first, the birds look like they have botulism but then, after vomiting, most seem to recover," she said. "The birds absolutely stink of alcohol when we collect them so now our vans smell like pubs!" RSPCA veterinarian David Couper said, "The birds appear disoriented and confused and struggle to stand. We took some video of one of the birds who is staggering around and losing his balance just like a person would if they'd had too much to drink." The RSPCA is urging breweries and other alcohol producers to make sure their waste isn't being left where wild animals can get to it. "These birds were clearly wearing their beer gog-gulls when they scavenged their meal for the day and they've really been suffering with hangovers after a gulls' night out," Scully said.

*-------------- READER COMMENTS --------------*

Lewis, you shouldn't be so critical of alcohol. If it weren't for alcohol you wouldn't have nearly so many Bizarre News stories.

When I read that 'daddy breastfeeding' story the first thing I thought of was, 'did he shave his nipples before he put them in that poor baby's mouth?'

The story about the drunk who nearly blew his hand off with a mortar reminds me of the joke about giving a redneck a vasectomy by putting a firecracker in a beer can and telling him to put it between his knees. But I forget exactly how the joke goes.
[Sorry, I don't know that one, but thanks for contributing. Anybody else feel like finishing this joke?]

*----------- END OF READER COMMENTS ----------*