Wednesday, June 6, 2018

Greetings fellow Bizarros:

Two stories popped up recently which make a perfect case for gun control if I ever heard it.

The first incident occurred in Colorado. A man in a crowded bar was dancing, and as the crowd cheered him on, the unnamed man did a backflip. Unfortunately, he was carrying a concealed weapon and the firearm fell out of the holster and onto the floor.

When he reached to retrieve the firearm, it discharged. A police spokesman said that a bystander in the crowd was hit by the bullet and was taken to a hospital.

Meanwhile, in Tennessee a shootout occurred involving two armed men who were caught in the middle of a home invasion. When they were discovered inside the house, they raised their weapons and fired. In the exchange both of the burglars were shot and killed.

Now here's the interesting part. The man who dropped his weapon while dancing in a bar and shot an innocent bystander is undercover FBI agent. The man who shot two armed burglars was the homeowner.

The homeowner from Tennessee (who did not want to be identified) said that he entered his home with a friend, and to their surprise, found the burglars inside. When the friend ran out of the home the suspects fired several shots in his direction. The homeowner, who was scared for his life, grabbed his own rifle and fired shots towards the suspects.

While speaking with reporters, the homeowner apologized to the families of the suspects and said: "A life is the last thing we want to take. I am sorry, but it was them or it was me."

Police are investigating the shooting, but for now, said he will likely not face any charges as this appears to be a "justified homicide."

No charges have been filed against the FBI agent either, but an investigation is underway.

So I'll leave it to the readers; who would benefit more from a little gun control?

Bizarrely,
Lewis

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Questions? Comments? Email: lewis@gophercentral.com




*----------- That's A Lot of Oysters -----------*
A competitive eater slurped down 480 oysters in 8 minutes to win a New Orleans competition and set a new record for the event. Darron Breedon of Orange, Va., bested six other competitors at the World Oyster Eating Championship at the Oyster Festival in New Orleans. Breedon downed 40 dozen oysters -- 480 total -- in eight minutes, leaving the competition in his dust. Defending champion Michelle Lesco of Tucson, Ariz., came in second after consuming 27 dozen in the time allotted. Organizers said Breedon's win was a new record for the event, sponsored by Acme Oyster House.

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*---------- I've Had Worse Prom Dates ----------*
A Pennsylvania teen who took a cardboard cutout of Danny DeVito to her prom saw the favor returned this week when the actor sported a cardboard cutout of her. Allison Cross made headlines last month when she took a life-sized DeVito cutout as her date to the Carlisle High School prom in Pennsylvania. Rob Mcelhenney, one of DeVito's costars on It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, posted a photo to Instagram showing DeVito with a cardboard cutout of Cross on the set of the TV series. "Hey Allison -- I heard you took cardboard Danny to prom. What a coincidence. He took cardboard Allison to Paddy's," Mcelhenney wrote. Cross responded to the photo on Twitter, writing: "Thank you SO, SO MUCH for fulfilling my dream of visiting Paddy's Pub from @alwayssunny!" she tweeted.




*-------------- READER COMMENTS --------------*
When I saw your headline; "Girls Find Sunken Bomb" I thought for sure you were going to talk about a previously unreleased Nicholas Cage movie.


I'm glad those honey bees in Houston weren't destroyed. You know the honey bee Colony Collapse Disorder is still a problem. Just because it isn't making headlines anymore doesn't mean the problem went away. You should do a story on that.
[You're right, it is still a problem. A problem that's being managed, but once again you're right, it hasn't been solved. Unfortunately I don't think it's going to be solved until we can figure out a way to move away from all of the pesticides that make modern agriculture possible.]

*----------- END OF READER COMMENTS ----------*