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THE DAILY GROANER - March 28, 2018

Good Morning Groanies,


So if you may recall, in January I had a fire in my house. Not in a cozy fireplace kinda way. It was more of a recalled de-humidifier from a sketchy manufacturer decided to pretend it was the Human Torch and "Flame On!" kinda way.

Now it's March, and to keep the household disaster train a rollin' we had water rain down from the ceiling from a disconnected tub drain. I KNOW!!! What next?!

First, it was fire. Now, it's water. I think the earthquake is scheduled for May. Oh, and the locusts are due over the 4th of July weekend! I can't wait to see what's in store this fall. I got to get a hard hat and start wearing a cup!

Oh, and thanks again for the positive feedback about our "Classic" look over here. It's good to hear from all of you. And it's good to be back.

Groaningly yours,
Steve


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Jokes? Comments? Questions? Email Steve


*-- Guess What I Heard? --*

"Guess what I heard today?" a man says to his wife.

"What, hon?" she asks.

"The mailman has seduced every woman on our block but one."

"Huh," his wife says, "I bet it's that stuck-up Phyllis next-door."



*-- Think About It --*

Stalking is when two people go for a long romantic walk together and only one of them knows it.

A mobile home with a flat tire is a home.

Can vegetarians eat animal crackers?



*-- Q and A Quickies --*


Q: Why did the scarecrow win a Nobel Peace Prize?

A: He was outstanding in his field!


Q: Why did the boy tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?

A: So he wouldn't wake the sleeping pills.

***

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