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Saturday, November 25, 2017

Greetings fellow Bizarros:

Shakes the Clown has been charged with groping two women at a holiday haunted house in Wisconsin, records show.

According to a criminal complaint, the victims had their breasts pawed last month while waiting to enter a "haunted barn" at a campground in Janesville. Police had been summoned to the scene following reports that women were "touched inappropriately by a clown."

Two women told cops that a "clown with green hair" first approached them and asked, "Do you want me to Donald Trump?" While making this inquiry, the clown "made a hand gesture towards their vaginas and made a squeezing motion," the complaint alleges.

Both women said that they "were not touched at that time," but had been "caught off guard by what the clown had said and found it inappropriate."

Following the "Trump" comment, the clown allegedly grabbed and squeezed the breast of one woman, and then did the same thing to her companion. The clown's actions, the women told police, left them feeling "violated and uncomfortable." Neither victim, investigators noted, gave the clown consent to grab her breast.

A sheriff's deputy subsequently identified the alleged assailant as Brandon Goral, a 43-year-old Janesville resident. Goral said that he "goes by the clown name of Shakes."

During questioning, Goral said that he "does not touch women's breasts" unless requested to do so. Goral claimed that he was asked multiple times by different females to grab their breasts for photos, adding that he had received that request several times that evening.

I don't know, sounds pretty scary to me.


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*--------------- Kids These Days ---------------*

A young girl was taken from her mother and handed over to the Department of Family and Child Services in California. The Palmdale Sheriff Station said in a press release that the mother, who was on the "wrong track," was arrested for "playing chicken" on the train tracks with her 4-year-old child. Police were called by concerned citizens regarding a woman and a child sitting on the train tracks. Detective Borits and Deputy Hegge arrived at the location and saw the child sitting on the train tracks while her mother, 26-year-old Ashley Hawkins, was 20 yards away looking down on her cell phone. The deputies immediately told the mother and child to get off the train tracks and go to an area that is a safe distance away. The mother told the detectives that she and her daughter sit on the train tracks every day. Detective Bortis cautioned the mother on the dangers of "playing chicken" with the train. He warned her of a recent fatality of a man being hit by a train not far from that location. "The mother expressed no due regard for the safety of her child and continued to state it was okay because they did it every day," police said. Police arrested Hawkins for willfully placing her young daughter in a dangerous situation. The child was taken into protective custody by the Department of Family and Child Services.


*----- Sounds Like Sexual Harassment To Me -----*

Las Vegas police are searching for a man who punched another man for groping him on the Strip. About 1:40 a.m. a patrol officer heard shouting near Harmon Avenue and Las Vegas Boulevard South, then saw one man punch another before fleeing. The officer chased the attacker, but lost track of him near Planet Hollywood Resort. Witnesses at the scene told police the man who was punched grabbed the puncher's rear end. When the man asked him to stop, he did it again and the man punched him. The man who was punched was briefly unconscious and was transported to the hospital with minor injuries. Sounds like he got off lucky. If he were in the entertainment industry or politics he would have lost his job and would be checking into a sex rehab facility in Europe somewhere by now.

*-------------- READER COMMENTS --------------*

My husband and I bought a second refrigerator for our apartment for use when we couldn't fit all our food in the one fridge. We also used it keep soda cold. A second fridge us hardly bizarre. -Chris
[That depends. Do you keep it next to your bed?]

I used to have a refrigerator in my bedroom, but I finally divorced her. -Don

LEWIS; It seems those police could have pulled a few leaves off of that hibiscus plant suspected of being marijuana and had them tested at the police lab before handcuffing/detaining that elderly couple and ransacking their house. -R.S.
[What's the fun in that?]

They should win their case, Lewis. That doesn't mean they will, though. -David

This is one weird McDonalds. They don't lock the drive through window, they keep $1400 in the register overnight, but they have surveillance cameras. Sounds like Florida.

*----------- END OF READER COMMENTS ----------*

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