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June 26, 2017

Good Morning Groanies,

10dollarsA co-worker sent me an email that stated the following: If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea... does that mean that one enjoys it?

I've spent the better part of the day thinking about this and this is what I've come up with... Whenever they say "4 out of 5... Recommend" in a commercial or iprint it on a product's packaging I always wonder, "Who the hell are these 5 jokers, why should their recommendation mean anything to me and which one thinks that they are better than the other four?" Am I wrong?

As a consumer I believe it's right to ask these questions, aloud in the store while I shop and draw looks from other shoppers.

Now, back to the original question. If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea... does that mean that one enjoys it? If that ONE person enjoys diarrhea then they should be detained immediately and studied. That's just not right. The lengths some folks will go to find enjoyment.

Groaningly yours,

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*-- What is This? --*

When the waitress in a New York City restaurant brought him the soup du jour, the Englishman was a bit dismayed. "Good heavens," he said, "what is this?"

"Why, it's bean soup," she replied.

"I don't care what it has been," he sputtered. "What is it now?"
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*-- We Were the First... --*

A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day. The Russian said, "We were the first in space!"

The American said, "We were the first on the moon!"

The Blonde said, "So what, we're going to be the first on the sun!"

The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook their heads. "You can't land on the sun, you idiot! You'll burn up!" said the Russian.

To which the Blonde replied, "We're not stupid, you know. We're going at night!"

*-- Q and A Quickies --*

Q: What happened when the wheel was invented?

A: It caused a revolution.

Q: Why did the teacher carry birdseed?

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