February 2, 2012
Greetings...Goooooood Morninggggggg humans!!! I hope you don't mind, but mama is a little busy today, so Moosie and I decided to help her out and give her one less thing to do...
You might remember us helping her from time to time in the past and since she does so much for us, we thought it was the least we could do for her...
Moosie and I flipped a bone to see who would help and I, Ginger won the toss. So how is everyone doing? Things around here are going great and life with the humans is still an enjoyable experience even though we still can't break some of their bad habits. We deal with it because we love them so much...
One of their bad habits is that they refuse to sleep in their beds that are on the floor. They insist on using the big one and no matter how much Moosie and I try to muscle them, they will NOT get down!!!
Maybe I should try spraying them in the face with a water bottle, but the truth is they look so dang cute curled up in a ball because they have no room to move after Moosie and I sneak in there as soon as daddy starts making that annoying sound that could wake the dead! I'm thinking of trying ear plugs...
Another one of daddy's bad habits is, well, I almost hate to tell you this, but...he lies! He's so good at it that we can never tell when he is pulling one over on us. Case in point, yesterday he came into the kitchen with our leashes. Well, Moosie and I got soooooo excited thinking we were going to...well, actually I have no idea why we get excited because we have no clue where we're going, but that's not the point...
We got into the car, happy, happy dogs. We went to the place called Petsmart and saw all of our human buddies that always run to greet us when we come in, (humans are so easy to amuse). We were having a great time, UNTIL daddy led us into "THE ROOM"...
Oh noooo, not THE ROOM...Things happen in there that are not normal and unnatural and the humans fool you in there because they are soooo nice until they start using Medieval tools to do things like, see how hot you are by sticking something where things usually come OUT, not go IN! Then they use a 10 foot needle and remove some red stuff from your leg and tell daddy they will be testing it. They NEVER put it back in, and for all the years we have been going there, I think Moosie and I are about a gallon down by now...
They must not trust us either because every time the human, I think her name is VET, checks our mouths. I guess she thinks we must have stolen something from the store and planning some kind of getaway with it in our mouths! She must think our second hiding place is in our ears because she brings out the spotlight to check in there!
This human is the sneakiest of sneaky too, she talks soooooo nice to us, rubs our bellies, scratches our heads, and actually makes us feel kinda good when IT happens...BAM! Another 10 foot needle comes out of nowhere and sticks us. No red stuff comes out this time and we barely flinch when it happens but it is dang annoying!!!
She said I'm doing great but have a slight eye infection in one eye. Mama said it's probably from me constantly sticking my face in the bushes when I'm looking for...well, actually, I really don't know what the heck I'm looking for. Mama has to put drops in twice a day which I'm not crazy about, but I indulge her and let her do her thing. The only other little problem I have is something called arthur itis in my one knee. I limp a little when walking, but can still run like the wind when I'm chasing a rabbit!
I gained 5 pounds and am a svelte 130 pounds. Moosie didn't fare as well and has been pouting ever since she was told she needs to lose a few pounds. She tipped the scales at 150 and I don't know who she is, but mama said she should call some human named Jenny Craig and introduce her to Moosie...In Moosie's defense, she is built different than I am and is much bigger boned, but mama told daddy she was getting chubby and she was right so I think the two of them are going to start being stingy with the good stuff...
I'm thinking Moosie overdid the Greek Yogurt (among other things), because we both love it, but Moosie will argue with daddy to stop eating it and let her finish it. I'm happy with a spoonful or two, but Moosie? she has no idea what portion control is...
I think I figured out why humans are always dieting, it's the food they eat. We have been free feeders since we were young pups and never gained weight above what was normal. We still eat the normal amount and yet both gained weight. Do you people realize human food is fattening? But....
It's sooooooooooooooooo goooooood!!!
We finally made it out of there in one piece no thanks to that Vet lady and I heard daddy talking to one human about bringing Moosie and I back next week for teeth cleaning. I don't remember too much about that, I just remember going in one day, going to sleep and waking up with Minty breathe. I guess that's from something I have heard humans talk about, the Tooth Fairy...
I didn't mean to go on and on here and had planned on letting Moosie share the writing duties today, but, as I said, she's pouting. Oh wait, she is here and wants to say something to all of you...
Hello Human friends...HELP!!! I'm being starved!!! SEND FOOD!! Call someone, ANYONE! CALL PIZZA HUT, tell them to deliver!!! Call the police on that human called Jenny Craig...Rooooooo Rooooooo Rooooooooo
Uh, sorry about that folks, I had to take the computer away from Moosie, until she composes herself. It's been nice chatting with you again and I'm sure Mama will let Moosie talk to you one day in the future and when she's sure Moosie isn't going to call the ASPCA on her for abuse. Moosie is soooooooooooooooo melodramatic!!!
And now, if you don't mind, I have to go outside, I heard a human voice talking on that big box in the family room and he was talking about some animal called a Groundhog that comes out once a year. Well, you know me, nothing makes me happier than a good 'ole hunt and this Groundhog is supposed to come out to see if he can see his own shadow, I thought I would go out to see if I can see him looking for his shadow. I better hurry because there are quite a few bushes out there to stick my face in before mama catches me. I hope Mr. Groundhog doesn't see my shadow before I see his...
Rooooo! Rooooo!
Ginger----------------------Missed an Issue? Visit the Anything Goes Archives