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Classic Laff-a-Day - June 29, 2010 ------------------------------------------------------------ Greetings Laff Lovers, For some reason Steve, the editor of The Daily Groaner, in- vited me to his wedding. I don't mind going. In fact, I sort of like weddings, particularly the free food. Plus, the bridesmaids usually provide me some good fantasy material for my next salami session. But since we are not exactly close 'Buds' I was stumped for an appropriate wedding present. Then I was struck with inspiration. I'm giving them a framed, 8x12 glossy picture of me. It is from a few years ago when I was in another wedding, and I don't mind saying I look good. Maybe Steve's new wife can use it when she masturbates. Generously, TZ Cell Phone Charging Shelf Stand You'll want one for every cell phone user.... List Price: $9.99 DEAL PRICE: $5.99 Get Two For: $9.98 Not only are dangling cords unsightly when charging your cell phone, MP3 player, phone, PDA, iPod, PSP, or other hand-held devices, you don't want to leave it on the floor where they can get stepped on or the cords can be a tripping hazard. This Cell Phone Charging Shelf Stand is a great little gadget. This handy shelf hangs adjacent to the plug, keeping your phone safe, and the cords neatly wrapped and out of the way. Just put it on top of your outlet, plug your cord through the opening, and wrap excess cord around base. Place device on plastic cradle. Cradle size is: 4" x 3" x 4". Great For Charging: - Cell Phones - PDAs - PSPs - iPods & other MP3 players - any other handheld devices... Get one for $5.99 or save more and get two for $9.98. "Also in California, Manny Ramirez of the L.A. Dodgers tested positive for a steroid that's sometimes used as a sexual enhancer. Apparently Manny couldn't get to third base on his own." -Craig Ferguson A woman was in court charged with the attempted murder of her husband. "But why did you stab him over a hundred times?" asked the judge. "Oh, your Honor," replied the defendant, "It wasn't my fault. I didn't know how to switch off the electric carving knife!" No pain... No expensive surgery... "Today, GM announced a loss of $6 billion. Or as GM calls it, 'kickin' ass!'" -Jimmy Fallon NEW & IMPROVED - PET BLINKERS... The Pet Safety Light Protect Yourself & Your Pet! Store Price: $7.99 DEAL PRICE: $3.99 or less Pet Blinkers give you the added security and peace of mind knowing you and your pet(s) are visible at night. Whether you?re going for a jog with your pet or if you just want extra attention, attach the Pet Blinker to your pet's collar and be seen a half-mile away. These eye-catching LEDs accessorize any pet. Requires three AG3 lithium cell batteries (included). A farmer walks into his bedroom with a sheep under his arm. "Honey, this pig is what I fuck when you don't feel well." The wife looks up from the magazine she's reading and says, "That's not a pig, it's a sheep." The man replies, "I was talking to the sheep." P.S. You can discuss this issue or any other topic in the new Classic Laffaday forum. Check it out here... ************************************************************ YOUR VIDEO SNACK BAR Top Viewed Videos... 1. Sherlock Holmes - A Clever Disguise 2. Bozo - The Worlds Most Famous Clown 3. Amos N´ Andy - In the IRS Office 4. It's Raining Oil in Louisiana 5. Celebrities: Before and After Make-Up 6. Marine Silent Marching

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