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June 24, 2010
WOULD-BE PILOT MAPS OUT LIFE FOR HIMSELF AND FUTURE FAMILY
DEAR ABBY: I'm a 15-year-old boy who is trying to figure out
my career. I'm with "Jen," the girl of my dreams, and I in-
tend on being with her forever. We plan to have kids in the
future.
I want to be a pilot, and Jen wants to be a stay-at-home
mom. I realize, though, that if I'm a pilot I won't be home
much, and I know that's not good for a couple trying to
start a family. All I ever dreamed about was becoming a
pilot, and I don't think I can give this up.
At the same time, my family comes first. How do I go about
solving this problem?
-- PLANNING AHEAD IN MISSOURI
DEAR PLANNING AHEAD: You appear to be a young man with his
feet on the ground. What you're not taking into consider-
ation is that there are many happily married pilots who
enjoy flourishing family lives as well as careers. Do some
more research about the various kinds of jobs that are
offered in the aviation industry, and you may be pleased
to find that you, too, can have both. And keep in mind that
your ambitions may change as you get older.
DEAR ABBY: My 73-year-old mother took it upon herself to go
to a senior center and learn how the computer works --
Internet, e-mails, etc.
She has five children, and we're all on the Internet. She
didn't tell us because she wanted it to be a surprise -- and
was it ever! I flipped when I turned on my computer and found
her name on an incoming message!
Abby, Mom doesn't own a computer, and the nearest senior
center that has one is 30 miles away, but that didn't stop
her.
We're currently setting up a computer for her, and I'm proud
to say that she'll be able to use it for more than playing
one of her favorite card games, Hearts. We're all proud of
Mom!
-- COLLEEN IN ST. PAUL, MINN.
DEAR COLLEEN: I salute your mother and the burgeoning number
of seniors who refuse to be intimidated by technology. Compu-
ters and cell phones have become cheaper and easier to use,
and Web-surfing isn't a "sport" that's meant to be enjoyed
only by the young. The computer-phobic can learn a lot from
your mother's example.
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DEAR ABBY: My wife and I have been married five years and
have a beautiful 4-year-old daughter. Two years ago, my
wife cheated on three different occasions with three dif-
ferent men. Each time she admitted her infidelity to me the
following day.
I was heartbroken. I have fallen out of love with her and
no longer find her attractive. I didn't leave immediately
because I didn't want our daughter to be raised in a broken
home. Also, my wife didn't have a job. I thought I could
forgive her and get over it, but I can't and don't think I
ever will.
Should I leave her or stay in a marriage where I feel I
am being unfair to myself and that I deserve better? Please
advise.
-- BETRAYED IN KANSAS
DEAR BETRAYED: I'm sorry your wife cheated on you -- three
times, yet. But if you have to ask me for permission to
leave her, the answer is no. You'll know the time is right
when you are ready to take the responsibility for that
decision all by yourself.
What teens need to know about sex, drugs, AIDS and getting
along with peers and parents is in "What Every Teen Should
Know." To order, send a business-sized, self-addressed
envelope, plus check or money order for $6 (U.S. funds) to:
Dear Abby -- Teen Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL
61054-0447. (Postage is included in the price.)
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as
Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline
Phillips. Write Dear Abby at
www.DearAbby.com
or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.