Victory At Sea - 26 Original Episodes, Digitally Restored... $9.99...
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July 16, 2010
WOMEN WHO LIVE ALONE FIND SAFETY INVENTING A HOUSEMATE
DEAR ABBY: I am a 27-year-old woman who lives alone in a
house I own. Sometimes strangers come to the house for var-
ious reasons -- plumbers, electricians, etc.
One question I am frequently asked is, "Do you live alone?"
I just don't know how to answer that question without feeling
like someone might take advantage of me. Can you help me and
other single women by providing an appropriate response?
-- CAUTIOUS BACHELORETTE,
HUNTSVILLE, ALA.
DEAR BACHELORETTE: Gladly. Your gut instincts are on target.
I ran your question by my local police department. While I
do not usually advise readers to lie, this is the exception
that proves the rule. If you are asked if you live alone,
reply: "No, I do not live alone. My boyfriend (brother,
nephew, etc.) lives here too. Why do you ask?"
DEAR ABBY: My parents are in their 60s and very healthy. Dad
has always been frugal. But ever since his retirement, saving
a buck seems to be the only thing that makes him happy. Mom
and Dad are comfortably well off, but all they seem to think
about is saving money.
My sibling and I are doing well enough that we don't need to
rely on inheritance money. We would rather see them enjoy
life than hold onto that money for us. Is Dad bored, or does
he need a hobby?
It has reached the point where it's embarrassing to go any-
where with them because Dad berates waiters at restaurants
and argues with store clerks over prices. When we're
shopping, he "disappears" until everything is paid for.
When I tell him I didn't expect him to pay, he gets defen-
sive and denies he was hiding. What do you make of this?
-- PULLING MY HAIR OUT
DEAR PULLING: I make of it that your parents are healthy,
retired with less money at their disposal than -- perhaps
-- they had counted on, and expect to live a long time. That
may be what is driving your already frugal father's behavior.
Many retirees today are doing with far less because of the
financial turmoil over the last few years. Some have had to
postpone their retirement entirely.
Because your father is arguing with servers over the price
of food -- which is not their fault because they don't set
the prices on the menu -- take him to less expensive rest-
aurants. And if his behavior when you're shopping embar-
rasses you, find other ways to spend time with him.
DEAR ABBY: I am a college student and four months pregnant.
This is my first pregnancy and I'm having a baby shower. I
recently heard that sometimes males are invited to the
shower. I would like to know if this is appropriate and if
I can do it. My mother thinks it's tacky, but this is 2010!
Is it acceptable? -- JESSICA IN CONNECTICUT
DEAR JESSICA: Yes, it is acceptable. Allow me to quote from
Emily Post's Etiquette, 17th Edition: "It is not uncommon
for men to be included on baby shower guest lists these days
-- and some lucky guys become shower honorees. (An Emily Post
Institute survey showed that over a third of respondents had
attended showers where the guest list was mixed.)"
Good advice for everyone -- teens to seniors -- is in "The
Anger in All of Us and How to Deal With It." To order, send
a business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or
money order for $6 (U.S. funds only) to: Dear Abby -- Anger
Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage
is included in the price.)
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as
Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline
Phillips. Write Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box
69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.