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June 15, 2010

TEEN PLANS A SHORT LIFE BASED ON CONVERSATION SHE OVERHEARD

DEAR ABBY: I'm 13 and I have cancer. My mom thinks I don't
know, but I do. I heard the doctor say I was better off with-
out any meds.

I have made a choice not to fall in love, and not to tell
even my closest friend that I'm only going to live to be
about 25-30 years old. My friend can't understand why I am
always sad and have never wanted a boyfriend. How do I tell
her to stop advising me to be happy and cheer up, and to
someday open my heart to love without telling her about my
short life?
-- MADE MY CHOICE, ANYWHERE, USA

DEAR MADE YOUR CHOICE: If ever I heard about a girl who
needs to have a talk with her mother, it is you. I don't
know what you think you overheard the doctor telling her,
but it is very possible that the "meds" he was talking about
had nothing to do with cancer. I would hate to see you ruin
your teen years because you jumped to a conclusion based on
a misunderstanding -- so please speak up NOW!


DEAR ABBY: Today, June 15, is World Elder Abuse Day. On this
day, communities all over the USA and the world will sponsor
events to shed light on the growing and tragic issue of
elder abuse.

Your readers, young and old, should be aware that the U.S.
Administration on Aging estimates that as many as 5 million
seniors are abused each year in the United States. And this
is only the tip of the iceberg, since only an estimated one
in five cases of abuse is ever reported to the authorities.

Elder abuse can be financial, physical, emotional or sexual,
and it also includes people who are neglected. But elder
abuse is preventable -- public awareness and education can
help people learn the warning signs. For more information
on what readers can do to join the fight against elder
abuse, visit www.centeronelderabuse.org.

Thank you, Abby, for all you do to help keep our seniors
safe.
-- LAURA MOSQUEDA, M.D., GERIATRICS,
UNIVERSITY OF CALIFORNIA AT IRVINE

DEAR DR. MOSQUEDA: If publicizing your message and your
website will help some of these vulnerable hidden victims,
I am more than pleased to help.

Readers, the elderly -- unlike child victims of abuse --
can slip through the cracks because too often they become
invisible. Either they drop out of sight, or no one suspects
what is going on until it is too late. Old people have been
found stashed in garages, suffering from bed sores, malnour-
ished and lying in their own waste. If you suspect abuse,
please report it so it can be investigated. All you have to
do is call Adult Protective Services. Every state has an
agency that provides this.

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DEAR ABBY: When I married the first time, I wore my mother's
wedding gown. She and Dad had a happy marriage. They were
married 47 years when Dad died.

My first husband and I divorced. We had two boys. I don't
think either of my children would want the dress. In fact,
I don't think ANYone would want it because the last time it
was worn led to divorce.

What should I do with the dress? I only have two nephews and
a step-granddaughter who is 5. I could save it for future
grandchildren, but I think the divorce issue is a spoiler.
-- JINXED IN KENTUCKY

DEAR JINXED: Why not donate the dress to a charity? If it's
in good condition, I'm sure some young woman who can't afford
to buy one would love to have it. And once it's out of the
family, the "jinx" would be dissipated, canceled out by your
generosity.



For an excellent guide to becoming a better conversationalist
and a more sociable person, order "How to Be Popular." Send
a business-sized, self-addressed envelope, plus check or
money order for $6 (U.S. funds) to: Dear Abby -- Popularity
Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage
is included in the price.)

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as
Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline
Phillips. Write Dear Abby at
www.DearAbby.com
or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.