MOUTHPIECE - November 15, 2016

Good Afternoon,

I'm growing old. It's true. And when one gets old there are truths that you must face and accept. Truths that tackle such topics as health, wisdom and food.

Today you will learn about these truths... and other stuff too.

Mouthing Off,
Carl

P.S. Did you miss an issue? You can read every issue from the Gophercentral library of newsletters on our exhaustive archives page. Thousands of issues, all of your favorite publications in chronological order. You can read AND comment. Just click GopherArchives


[m] q u o t e s . o f . t h e . d a y
"A kleptomaniac is a person who helps himself because he can't help himself."
--Henry Morgan

"My theory is that all of Scottish cuisine is based on a dare."
--Mike Myers

"Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first."
--Mark Twain



[m] What's On the Web?
Cubicle Freakout!
Are you having a bad day at the office? Well, let out your office anger and smash up your computer! Wait... not your actual stuff, the stuff in the game. Whew, that was a close one.

Visit: Cubicle Freakout!


Switcheroo Zoo
Create your own new animals at this surrealistic virtual zoo. Switch the animals' heads, legs and tails to make one-of-a-kind creatures. Play online for free with Switch Zoo Online.

Visit: Switcheroo Zoo



[m] b i t s . n . b o b s
*-- TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD --*
1) Growing up is mandatory; growing old is optional.

2) Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.

3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down there. (my favorite...)

4) You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.

5) It's frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.

6) Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.

7) Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.

***
Missed an Issue? Visit the Mouthpiece Archives