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MOUTHPIECE - May 13, 2014

Good Afternoon,


After all of the cards that were given out over this last weekend, Mother's Day Weekend, I began to think about all of those cards you will NEVER see in Hallmark store. And luckily, there's a list about such a thing. There are lists about everything!

Number 7 is my personal favorite: "If I get only one thing for Christmas, I hope it's your sister."

But before you get there make sure to check out the quotes, Celebrity Peanuts (what?), and Illustrations Of Famous TV And Movie Duos Blissfully Hanging Out (Okay?).

We got a lot of stuff going here. Relax and enjoy!

Mouthing Off,
Carl


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[m] q u o t e s . o f . t h e . d a y

"Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing."
--Redd Foxx

"Habit is habit and not to be flung out of the window by any man, but coaxed downstairs a step at a time."
--Mark Twain

"Without discipline, there's no life at all."
--Katharine Hepburn


[m] What's On the Web?

Celebrity Peanuts

From the Dailymail.co.uk: He must be nuts! Man spends hours creating tiny statues of celebrities out of PEANUTS.

Visit: Celebrity Peanuts


Pop Culture Buddies: Illustrations Of Famous TV And Movie Duos Blissfully Hanging Out

From Uproxx.com: If famous fictional characters took a break from entertaining us to spend an afternoon enjoying each other's company, what kind of activities would they bond over? That's the question Australian artist Dave Collinson answers with his "Pop Culture Buddies" illustration series, which features Jesse and Heisenberg, The Dude and Walter Sobchak, Marty McFly and Doc Brown, and other famous TV and movie characters blissfully hanging out together.

Visit: Pop Culture Buddies: Illustrations Of Famous TV And Movie Duos Blissfully Hanging Out


[m] b i t s . n . b o b s

*-- Cards You Will Never See In Hallmark --*

1. "Congratulations on your wedding day! Too bad no one likes your wife."

2. "How could two people as beautiful you have such an ugly baby?"

3. "I've always wanted to have someone to hold, someone to love. After having met you, I've changed my mind."

4. "I must admit, you brought Religion in my life. I never believed in Hell til I met you."

5. "Looking back over the years that we've been together, I can't help but wonder: What was I thinking?"

6. "As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am that you're not here to ruin it for me."

7. "If I get only one thing for Christmas, I hope it's your sister."

8. "As you grow older, Mom, I think of all the gifts you've given me. Like the need for therapy..."

9. "Thanks for being a part of my life!!!I never knew what evil was before this!"

10. "Congratulations on your promotion. Before you go, would like to take this knife out of my back. You'll probably need it again."

***

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