Tuesday, May 21, 2013

Good Afternoon,

Who doesn't look for a few helpful tips to make life much simpler? I know I do.

Lately, life could use a bit of simplicity if you asked me, but you probably didn't. So anyway, take these 8 excellent tips to heart and make your life as easy as possible and give yourself a little time for you... or more time to read Mouthpiece.

Could I make this any easier to understand? Somebody please get me an easy button.

Mouthing Off,
Carl

P.S. EVTV1 is back and better than ever! This video portal was created to weed through the online clutter to bring you the best animal video clips...funniest videos...most popular...PLUS the most unusual. New videos are added daily! It's the future of entertainment available today, all in one place.

Visit and Enjoy: EVTV1.com


[m] q u o t e s . o f . t h e . d a y
"I shall not waste my days in trying to prolong them."
--Ian Fleming (1908-1964)

"If you can count your money, you don't have a billion dollars."
--J. Paul Getty (1892-1976)

"Facts are the enemy of truth."
--Don Quixote - "Man of La Mancha"


[m] What's On the Web?
DJ Name Generator
Randomly generate your own DJ names. There's millions of possibilities and styles. Mine is DJ Chat-A-Lot Carl. Now I'm cool, right?

Visit: DJ Name Generator


Maker vs. Marker
Maker vs. Marker is clever video that features a stop motion fight between animator and animation taking place on a whiteboard. It's art in motion!

Visit: Maker vs. Marker


[m] b i t s . n . b o b s
*-- Helpful Tips To Make Life Simpler --*
1. Old telephone books make ideal personal address books. Simply cross out the names and addresses of people you don't know.

2. Fool other drivers into thinking you have an expensive car phone by holding an old TV or video remote control up to your ear and occasionally swerving across the road and mounting the curb.

3. Lose weight quickly by eating raw pork and rancid tuna. I found that the subsequent food poisoning enabled me to lose 12 pounds in only 2 days.

4. Avoid parking tickets by leaving your windshield wipers turned to fast wipe whenever you leave your car parked illegally.

5. No time for a bath? Wrap yourself in masking tape and remove the dirt by simply peeling it off.

6. Apply red nail polish to your nails before clipping them. The red nails will be much easier to spot on your bathroom carpet. (Unless you have a red carpet, in which case a contrasting polish should be selected).

7. If a person is choking on an ice cube, don't panic. Simply pour a jug of boiling water down their throat and presto! The blockage is almost instantly removed.

8. Save on booze by drinking cold tea instead of whiskey. The following morning you can create the effects of hangover by drinking a thimble full of dish washing liquid and banging your head repeatedly on the wall.

(From: ahajokes.com)

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