Thursday, April 28, 2011
Greetings Laff Lovers,
I was washing my coffee mug when one of the broads walked in.
"You know, TZ, I had something to ask you but I've completely
forgotten what it was."
"Perhaps you were going to ask me to 'do you real special'
because your husband is a prude who is incapable of satisfying
anyone but himself?"
She gave me that familiar 'I should sue him' look and walked
out.
"Hey, come here!" I shouted after her, "do my dishes for me
and we'll work something out!" I continued to wash my mug,
muttering, "Bitches, man. Bitches."
Satisfyingly,
TZ
Send me comments, jokes and pictures of all the hot women in
your family at this link: mailto:tz@gophercentral.com
Do you like to giggle? Do you like telling jokes?
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Old man Fielding, the miser, at last went to his reward and
presented himself at the Pearly Gates. St. Peter greeted him
with appropriate solemnity and escorted him to his new abode.
Walking past numerous elegant mansions finally they arrived
at a dilapidated shack at the end of the street.
Fielding, much taken aback, began, "Why do I get a rundown
shack when all of these others have fine mansions?"
"Well, sir," replied St. Peter, "we did the best we could with
the money you sent us."
Why can't a lesbian go on a diet and wear makeup at the same
time?
Because it?s hard to eat Jenny Craig with Mary Kay on your face.
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The metric system did not really catch on in the States, unless
you count the increasing popularity of the nine-millimeter
bullet. --Dave Barry
Procrastinating is like masturbating: You're only fucking
yourself.
"Watching your daughter being collected by her date feels like
handing over a million dollar Stradivarius to a gorilla."
---Jim Bishop
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*** THE WORLD ACCORDING TO TZ ***
It's Available. The Laffaday Book... Check it out, it's
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An incompetent counterfeiter spent all day making his funny
money. At the end of the day he realizes he spent all his
time making $15 bills.
He figures that the only way he's going to get anything from
this batch of money is to find a place where the people aren't
too bright and change his phony money for real cash.
He travels to a small town in West Virginia and walks into a
small "Mom and Pop" grocery store. He goes to the old man
behind the counter and asks him, "Do you have change for a
$15 bill?"
The old man replies, "I sure do, Sonny. How would you like
that? An 8 and a 7 or two 6s and a three?"
I was walking passed the conference room where a sales training
session was in progress, when I overheard one of the salesmen
say, "I didn?t get that. Can you show me again?"
The head of sales said, "OK," as he began to get down on his
knees. "But I?m only going to show you this one more time..."
Email TZ at: mailto:tz@laffaday.com