Thursday, May 17, 2012

Greetings Laff Lovers,

"Will you help unload the truck?" my wife asked.

"Sure," I said. "What's in the truck?"

"The new light fixtures and microwave. The salesman said we'll need an electrician to install the microwave above our oven."

"What the fu-- I mean, why did you suddenly buy all this stuff?"

"You said I could."

"Me? When the fuc...when?"

"Saturday night."

"Saturday night? What, when we were in bed?"

"Yes. You said: 'Do whatever you want.'"

"Yeah, that's because I thought you wanted to blow me, not redecorate the fucking house."

Misunderstoodly,

TZ

Send me comments, jokes and pictures of all the hot women in your family at this link: tz@gophercentral.com

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"Same-sex marriage would have men married to men and women married to women. Well, who complains about the credit card bill and who says, "Well, you want me to look nice, don't you?" And who writes the thank-you notes and who just signs their name?" -Dave Letterman



An Australian scientist has invented a bra which offers more support and prevents a woman's breasts from bouncing up and down.

After announcing his invention, the scientist was taken outside where a large group of men beat the shit out of him.



"The Octomom has finished her porn movie. The producers saved a lot of time on the credits because nobody wanted any." -Jay Leno



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"And what was the culmination of events that led you to file this action?" asked the man's attorney in the divorce hearing.

"All through our marriage my wife was less than responsive to my sexual initiatives," replied the husband, "but the clincher came one morning last month at the breakfast table."

"Why? What happened?"

"She announced, 'Just so you don't get your hopes up, I'm already beginning to get a headache.'"