Monday, July 29, 2013

Greetings Laff Lovers,

This morning I walked in on the middle of a story being related by one of our customer service girls. She was telling Satan, the office manager, about how an irate customer had called complaining that a number he found on our e-Commerce site at www.pulsetv.com had lead him to a phone sex line.

"What!" I cried. "When did we start doing phone sex? I better get credit for it. I suggested we do phone sex eight years ago. With all the bitches we have in this office it's a no-brainer! Plus, Clean Laffs Joe can handle any homos who call in. What's the number? I want to call and do some quality control."

"Relax." Hissed Satan. "It was a mistake. The old guy obviously misdialed the customer service number. Apparently it's only a couple numbers off from some nasty sex line."

"Hmmm...do we know which number?"

Investigatingly,

TZ

Send me comments, jokes and pictures of all the hot women in your family at this link: tz@gophercentral.com

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I was making love to this girl and she started crying.

I said, "Are you going to hate yourself in the morning?"

She said. "No. I hate myself now."

--Rodney Dangerfield



One night a fellow drove his secretary home after she had imbibed a little too much at an office reception. Although this was an innocent gesture, he decided not to mention it to his wife, who tended to get jealous easily.

The next night the man and his wife were driving to a rest- aurant. Suddenly he looked down and spotted a high-heel shoe half hidden under the passenger seat. Not wanting to be conspicuous, he waited until his wife was looking out her window before he scooped up the shoe and tossed it out of the car.

With a sigh of relief, he pulled into the restaurant parking lot. That's when he noticed his wife squirming around in her seat. "Honey," she asked, "have you seen my other shoe?"



"Masturbation: the primary sexual activity of mankind. In the nineteenth century, it was a disease; in the twentieth, it is a cure." --Thomas Szasz



A guy goes to the doctor and says, "Doc, you gotta help me! Every time I look at myself in the mirror when I'm nude, I get a raging hard on. Is there something wrong with me?"

The doctor checks him over, does some tests and explains, "I've found the cause of your erection when you look in the mirror, but I'm not sure I can treat the problem."

"Why not? What's the problem?"

The Doctor says, "You look like a pussy."