Monday, August 6, 2012

Greetings Laff Lovers,

Lewis and I were comparing old and contemporary movies.

"I like the old ones better," I said. "They were deeper. Had more meaning."

"Yeah...Hey, who was the guy who got butt-raped in Deliverance?"

"Ned Beatty. See? They just don't make 'em like that anymore."

Reviewingly,

TZ

Send me comments, jokes and pictures of all the hot women in your family at this link: tz@gophercentral.com

P.S. Looking for money-savings tips, information helpful to women, and some good-natured fun? If so, take a moment or two and check out the Mommy Blogroll to the right and visit some of the best "Mommy Blogs" online.



"A school in New Zealand discovered that a model skeleton for an anatomy class was actually a real human skeleton. Yeah, they made the realization when they noticed they hadn't seen their anatomy teacher in about eight months." -Jimmy Fallon



A woman said to her friend, "I don't know what to do. My husband is such a mess maker that you can't imagine. He doesn't put anything in its place, I am always going around the house organizing things."

The friend says, "Take a tip from me. The first week after we were married I told my husband firmly, 'Every glass and plate that you take, wash when you are done and put back in its place.'"

The first woman asked, "Did it help?"

Her friend said, "I don't know. I haven't seen him since."



"Brewers in Austria have created a cheese-infused beer. Didn't that used to be called 'vomit?'" -Jay Leno


*** THE WORLD ACCORDING TO TZ ***
It's Available. THE Laffaday Book... Check it out, it's 91 cents! (plus s&h). For more info or to order visit: THE WORLD ACCORDING TO TZ



Dear Abby,

I have an oral sex etiquette question. While I love pleasing my lady, occasionally while in the middle of a "carpet munching" session a hair gets caught in the back of my throat. I think hacking up a hairball like a cat on speed at that special time might be considered poor taste. How can I take care of business and remove the offending piece of "wool" and keep the mood?

Sincerely, Munchy

Dear Munchy:

Preparation, preparation, preparation, my son, is the key to successful tongue lashing. Right after your lady buys you a really expensive present, cooks you a fine, fine meal and finishes mowing the lawn with the second-hand, push lawnmower you purchased for her on your last anniversary, simply hand her a razor and remind her that her "back 40" also needs a good clip. Remember, an "idle" woman is a devil in the making.

Abby