Thursday, October 2, 2014

Greetings Laff Lovers,

The other day I was going through my basement office at home and I discovered a stack of old Playboys and Maxims in a bottom drawer of my desk. I spent a very enjoyable hour paging through them and reacquainting myself with some of my favorite models.

Then it occurred to me that I haven't bought a magazine in years. The reason? The abundance of Internet porn. With a few keystrokes you can pull up anything from teenage Asian transsexuals to middle-aged, American housewives with anal fetishes...all for free.

A 200-page magazine just can't compete for five or six bucks.

It made me a little nostalgic and yes, even sad at what appears to be the twilight of an era. How long can porn in the classical format last in the face of the Internet?

I think on the way home tonight I'll stop and pick up a Hustler or a Big 'Uns just for old time's sake. Do you think my wife will buy that?

Nostalgically,

TZ

Send me comments, jokes and pictures of all the hot women in your family at this link: tz@gophercentral.com

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"Harley-Davidson is recalling more than 100,000 motorcycles because of a problem with the clutch that could cause crashes. As opposed to that other thing that causes crashes: dads in a mid-life crisis who have no business riding a Harley." -Jimmy Fallon



Recently a man had to go to the hospital to have his wedding ring cut off from his penis after his girlfriend found the ring in his pants pocket and got so mad at him she stuck it on him while he was asleep.

Which is worse...

Having your girlfriend find out you're married...

Explaining to your wife how your wedding ring got on your penis...

Or finding out your penis fits through your wedding ring?



This is a frightening statistic !

25 percent of the women in this country are on medication for mental illness.

That's scary. It means 75 percent are running around untreated.



A little boy goes to his dad and asks, 'What is Politics?'

Dad says, 'Well son, let me try to explain it this way: I am the head of the family, so call me The President.

Your mother is the administrator of the money, so we call her the Government.

We are here to take care of your needs, so we will call you the People.

The nanny, we will consider her the Working Class. And your baby brother, we will call him the Future.

Now think about that and see if it makes sense.'

So the little boy goes off to bed thinking about what Dad has said. Later that night, he hears his baby brother crying, so he gets up to check on him.

He finds that the baby has messed his diaper.

So the little boy goes to his parent's room and finds his mother asleep. Not wanting to wake her, he goes to the nanny's room. Finding the door locked, he peeks in the keyhole and sees his father in bed with the nanny.

He gives up and goes back to bed.

The next morning, the little boy says to his father, 'Dad, I think I understand the concept of politics now.'

The father says, 'Good, son, tell me in your own words what you think politics is all about.'

The little boy replies, 'The President is screwing the Working Class while the Government is sound asleep. The People are being ignored and the Future is in deep shit.