Thursday, September 1, 2011

Greetings Laff Lovers,

I stumbled across an article this morning about the 12 signs of depression in men. It is entitled, 12 Signs of Depression in Men.

Apparently more than 5 million men in the U.S. experience depression, although it gets reported much less frequently than depression in women.

So in order to educate men of this lurking epidemic the author listed 12 symptoms so the poor bastards cursed with a Y chromosome can diagnose themselves.

They include; fatigue (which boasts fun-sounding side effects like psychomotor retardation), sleeping too much or too little, stomach or back aches, irritability, hostility, stress, anxiety, substance abuse, sexual dysfunction, indecision and suicidal thoughts.

I hate to break it to whoever wrote that article, but a large portion of the male population has a simpler term to describe those symptoms. Turning 45.

Diagnosingly,

TZ

Send me comments, jokes and pictures of all the hot women in your family at this link: tz@gophercentral.com



"When his life was ruined, his family killed, his farm destroyed, Job knelt down on the ground and yelled up to the heavens, "Why, God? Why me?" and the thundering voice of God answered, "There's just something about you that pisses me off." --Stephen King



My girlfriend and I were making love last night when she looked up at me and said, "Make love to me like in the movies". So I turned her over on all fours, stuck it in her ass, pulled it out, flipped her back over and came all over her face and hair.

She cried.

I guess we don't watch the same kind of movies.



"A guy in Florida was charged with 10 counts of child pornography. He's blaming his cat. He says that the cat would jump on the keyboard and somehow that would download child pornography. It turns out it was a huge misunderstanding ? the cat was downloading 'kitty' porn." -Jimmy Kimmel



*** THE WORLD ACCORDING TO TZ ***
It's Available. THE Laffaday Book... Check it out, it's 91 cents! (plus s&h). For more info or to order visit: THE WORLD ACCORDING TO TZ



ADULT SEX QUIZ

Q.) What doesn't belong in this list: Meat, Eggs, Wife, Blowjob?
A.) Blowjob: You can beat your meat, eggs, or wife,but you can't beat a blowjob.

Q.) Why does a penis have a hole in the end?
A.) So men can be open minded.

Q.) What's the speed limit of sex?
A.) 68 because at 69 you have to turn around.

Q.) What do a Rubix cube and a penis have in common?
A.) The longer you play with them, the harder they get.

Q.) What's the difference between your paycheck and your dick?
A.) You don't have to beg your wife to blow your paycheck!

Q.) Three words to ruin a man's ego...
A.) "Is it in?"

Q.) What do you get when you cross Raggedy Ann and the Pillsbury Dough Boy?
A.) A red headed bitch with a yeast infection.

Q.) How can you tell when an auto mechanic just had sex?
A.) One of his fingers is clean.

Q.) What do you do with 365 used rubbers?
A.) Melt them down make a tire, and call it a Goodyear.

Q.) What do bungee jumping and hookers have in common?
A.) They both cost a hundred bucks and if the rubber breaks, you're screwed.