Monday, January 30, 2012

Greetings Laff Lovers,

As I get older I find that I am becoming more and more spiritual. I believe helping humanity and spreading peace to be paramount in the journey to enlightenment and eternal bliss. It was with these thoughts that I decided to buy a couple of raffle tickets from the kid asking all the passersby, "Want to win the raffle for the mentally challenged?"

So I spent a few dollars, jumped into my car and headed back to the office where I bumped into Lewis.

"What are you studying so intently, TZ?" he asked.

"Well, I just bought these raffle tickets that I think are supposed to benefit retarded children. But the kid's pitch who sold them to me has got me a little worried."

"Why, what did he say?" Lewis asked.

"Well, he kept repeating, 'Win the raffle for the mentally challenged! Win the raffle for the mentally challenged!'"

"Yeah, so?" Lewis asked confused.

"Well, now I'm worried that I just entered a raffle to win an actual retard."

Panickingly,

TZ

Send me comments, jokes and pictures of all the hot women in your family at this link: tz@gophercentral.com

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"A Florida man was recently arrested for taking up-skirt shots at Wal-Mart. It will come to trial as soon as they can find 12 jurors willing to look at up-skirt shots of Wal-Mart shoppers." -Conan O'Brien



An Italian woman gets onto a bus with her baby. The bus driver says, "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen. Ugh!"

The Italian woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "Eh, dat driver ova dere justa insulteda me!"

The man said, "You go right up there and tell him off. Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."



"According to a Cosmo poll, 13 percent of all men admit they have tried on a bra. The sad part, 43 percent of American men actually need one." --Jay Leno



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A 65-year-old woman is naked, jumping up and down on her bed laughing like an idiot.

Her husband walks into the bedroom and sees her. He watches her a while then says, "You look ridiculous, what on earth are you doing?"

She says, "I just got my checkup and my doctor says I have the breasts of an eighteen-year-old." She starts laughing and jumping again.

He says, "Yeah, right. And what did he say about your 65 year-old ass?"

She says, "Well, your name never came up."