Monday, July 26, 2010
Greetings Laff Lovers,
I think teenage girls are crazier than I ever thought they
were. I have three older sisters and I don't remember any
of them acting as hostile as my daughters do. I mean, deez
bitches crazy!
The littlest incident turns into thermal nuclear war. My 12-
year old daughter accidentally stepped on my 9-year-old son's
foot. He immediately howled in pain, and she immediately tore
into him for being a 'crybaby sissy.'
I tried to explain to her that most kids would be crybaby
sissies for a few seconds if their foot was smashed down on
a hard floor, but she yelled back, "He's the king of crybaby
sissies because he cries about everything!"
I yelled at her to get her to shut up (didn't work) and then
I told him to can it. He didn't, so I yelled at him to "Stop
being such a damn crybaby sissy!"
I-now-know-why-my-dad-leftly,
TZ
Send me comments, jokes and pictures of all the hot women in
your family at this link: mailto:tz@gophercentral.com
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"In the movie 'Salt' Angelina Jolie is accused of being a
Russian spy. She might be a spy and she might not. She's
spy-curious." -Craig Ferguson
Darren marries this girl, and they go on their honeymoon.
He leaves the room the first night to go down to the lobby
to get a pack of cigarettes.
When he gets back, his bride is lying on the bed naked
fucking one of the bellhops. Another one is under her,
getting her in the ass. She's sucking off the desk clerk,
and she's jerking off a cab driver and the dishwasher.
Darren screams, "What the fuck are all these jerk-offs doing
in here?!"
She says, "Well, you always knew I was a flirt."
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Dear Abby,
I have an oral sex etiquette question. While I love pleasing
my lady, occasionally while in the middle of a "carpet
munching" session a hair gets caught in the back of my
throat. I think hacking up a hairball like a cat on speed
at that special time might be considered poor taste. How
can I take care of business and remove the offending piece
of "wool" and keep the mood?
Sincerely, Munchy
Dear Munchy:
Preparation, preparation, preparation, my son, is the key to
successful tongue lashing. Right after your lady buys you a
really expensive present, cooks you a fine, fine meal and
finishes mowing the lawn with the second-hand, push lawnmower
you purchased for her on your last anniversary, simply hand
her a razor and remind her that her "back 40" also needs a
good clip. Remember, an "idle" woman is a demon in the making.
Abby
Email TZ at: mailto:tz@laffaday.com