Thursday, October 16, 2014

Greetings Laff Lovers,

TZ, we're having a baby and I want you to help me name her. My husband (who is white) wants a traditional name that whitey will like. But I'm black and want my daughter to have a name that will mean something and set her apart. Got any ideas? -Love Coco


Hi Coco, I like your trying to instill a sense of character into your daughter. I think it's important to help them realize their individuality. So many times our names end up being an accurate reflection of our personalities. For example, every Billy I've ever known was a dick, and I've wanted to plug every Kathy or Katie I've ever known. That being said, please consider these names for your future daughter. Lavitra, Propecia, Amnesia, and if she's a small baby, how about Micronesia? --TZ

Nominating-ly,

TZ

Send me comments, jokes and pictures of all the hot women in your family at this link: tz@gophercentral.com

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A guy comes home from work, walks into his bedroom, and finds a stranger fucking his wife. He says, "What the hell are you two doing?"

His wife turns to the stranger and says, "I told you he was stupid."



As a painless way to save money, a young couple arranged that every time they have sex the husband puts his pocket change into a china piggy bank on the bedside table. One night while being unusually athletic, he accidentally knocked the piggy bank onto the floor where it smashes.

To his surprise, among the masses of coins, there are handfuls of five and ten dollar bills. He asks his wife "What's up with all the bills?"

To his wife which replies, "Well, not everyone is as cheap as you are."



A woman once said that a man is like a deck of playing cards...

You need a Heart to love him
A Diamond to marry him
A Club to smash his fucking head in
And a Spade to bury him.



A beautiful woman loved gardening, but couldn't seem to get her tomatoes to turn red. One day, while taking a stroll, she came upon a gentleman neighbor who had the most beautiful garden full of huge red tomatoes.

The woman asked him, "What do you do to get your tomatoes so red?"

The gentlemen responded, "Well, twice a day I stand in front of my tomato garden naked in my trench coat and flash them. My tomatoes turn red from blushing so much."

Well, the woman was so impressed; she decided to try doing the same thing to her tomato garden to see if it would work. So twice a day for two weeks she flashed her garden hoping for the best.

One day the gentleman was passing by and asked the woman, "By the way, how did you make out? Did your tomatoes turn red?"

"No," she replied, "but my cucumbers are enormous."