Thursday, February 12, 2015

Greetings Laff Lovers,

Clean Laffs Joe accosted me in the office kitchen this morning and said, "Got any exciting plans for Valentine's Day, TZ?"

"Why," I asked, "lookin' for some ideas?"

"Actually, I am," he answered, "but it's gotta be cheap! I don't have any money to throw around now that I have a house to pay for."

"Hmmm...cheap but exciting...why don't you pour a bottle of wine down down your wife's throat and then slam dunk her one?"

"Jesus, TZ, whatever happened to romance? Besides," he said, digging me in the ribs with his elbow, "what do you think we do most weekends?"

"Ok, if you want to spice things up, stick it up her ass. That ought to surprise her."

Spontaneously,

TZ

Send me comments, jokes and pictures of all the hot women in your family at this link: tz@gophercentral.com

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"Valentine's Day is weird. A nude flying baby that shoots arrows isn't a holiday. It's a horror movie." -Jimmy Kimmel



"I've got some good news and some bad news" the doctor says.

"What's the bad news?" asks the patient.

"The bad news is that unfortunately you've only got 3 months to live". The patient is taken aback, "What's the good news then, Doctor?"

The doctor points over to the secretary at the front desk, "You see that blonde with the big tits, tight ass and legs that go all the way up to heaven?"

The patient nods his head. The doctor replies, "I'm fucking her."



"The new Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue comes out next week. That's especially exciting news for guys who don't know about the Internet." -Seth Meyers



One day Ole and Sven were paging through the Sears Catalog and admiring all the beautiful models.

Ole said to Sven, "Haf you seen da perdy girls in dis catalog?"

Sven replied, "Ya. Dey sure are bootiful, an yust look at da prices!"

Ole looked wide eyed and said, "Yumpin' yimminy. Dey ain't very expensive. At dees prices I'm buyin' me vun."

Sven smiled, patted Ole on the back and said, "by golly Ole, if she's as perdy as she looks in da catalog, I vill get vun too."

Three weeks later Sven came by and asked Ole, "did ja ever git dat girl you ordered from da Sears Catalog?"

Ole replied, "no, but it von't be long now, her clothes came yesterday!"