Monday, March 31, 2014

Greetings Laff Lovers,

One never knows how or when inspiration will strike. You could be in the shower, or driving, or chopping wood when a light comes on and the answer to whatever issue you have comes rolling over you like an warm blanket.

Over the years I've learned to listen to that little voice no matter what I was doing at the time. That's why my wife was not surprised when I suddenly rolled off of her, kicked of the covers and jumped out of bed.

"What is it, Honey?" she said a little out of breath. "Are you having an epiphany?"

"No. The fucking dog put his cold, wet nose all the way up my ass."

Shockingly,

TZ

Send me comments, jokes and pictures of all the hot women in your family at this link: tz@gophercentral.com

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"The Department of Health and Human Services officially recognized obesity as a medical illness. Doctors say symptoms include shortness of breath and 'wideness' of ass." --Conan O'Brien



A secretary walked into her boss's office and said, "I'm afraid I've got some bad news for you."

"Why do you always have to give me bad news?" he complained. "Tell me some good news for once."

"Alright, here's some good news," said the secretary. "You're not sterile."



"The Web brings people together because no matter what kind of a twisted sexual mutant you happen to be, you've got millions of pals out there. Type in 'Find people that have sex with goats that are on fire' and the computer will say, 'Specify type of goat.'" --Rich Jeni



A business man packing for a trip glances in his briefcase.

"Honey?"

"Yes, darling?"

"Honey," he says, in mild exasperation, "why do you persist in putting a condom in my briefcase every time I go on a trip? You know I only have eyes for you. I'd never be unfaithful."

"Oh, I know, darling, and I trust you," she replies sweetly. "It's just that, well you know, with all those terrible diseases out there, it would make me feel better to know that if anything did happen, you'd be protected. So please, darling, take it with you, won't you? For my peace of mind?"

"Oh, alright, if you put it that way," he relented. "I'll do it for you. But for safety's sake, better give me a couple."