Thursday, April 9, 2015

Greetings Laff Lovers,


"Hi TZ, You know your girlfriend is too young when you have to make those airplane noises so you can put something in her mouth." -Richard


It takes a lot more than airplane noises for me to get my wife to put anything in her mouth. Two or three glasses of wine is usually a good start...followed by some kind of jewelry. But airplane noises? No.

Strategically,

TZ

Send me comments, jokes and pictures of all the hot women in your family at this link: tz@gophercentral.com

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I failed my audition as Romeo through a misunderstanding over a stage direction. In my script it clearly said: "Enter Juliette from the rear."



Wife texts husband on a cold winter's morning:
"Windows frozen, won't open."

Husband texts back:
"Gently pour some lukewarm water over it and gently tap edges with hammer."

Wife texts back 5 minutes later:
"Computer really fucked up now."



"My God!" complained the wife to her husband, "I come home with a little cum in my hair and right away you jump to conclusions."



An angry wife was complaining about her husband spending all his free time in a bar, so one night he took her along with him.

"What'll you have?" he asked.

"Oh, I don't know. The same as you I suppose," she replied.

So, the husband ordered a couple of Jack Daniel's and threw his down in one shot. His wife watched him, then took a sip from her glass and immediately spat it out.

"Yuck, that's TERRIBLE!" she spluttered. "I don't know how you can drink this stuff!"

"Well, there you go," cried the husband. "And you think I'm out enjoying myself every night!"