Thursday, June 9, 2011

Greetings Laff Lovers,

It finally happened. My wife has turned into me. The other day I managed to make it home early and the wife and I found ourselves home alone with about half an hour before the kids came home.

So I asked her, "Do you want a quickie?"

And she answered, "As opposed to what?"

A-taste-of-my-own-medicine-ly,

TZ

Send me comments, jokes and pictures of all the hot women in your family at this link: mailto:tz@gophercentral.com



"If I get married again, I want a guy there with a drum to do rimshots during the vows." -Sam Kinison



Dave was staring sadly into his beer and sighed heavily.

"What's up Dave?" asked the bartender. "It's not like you to be so down in the mouth."

"It's my five-year-old son," the man replied.

"Don't tell me, he's in trouble for fighting in school? My boy's just the same ? forget about it; it happens to boys that age," said the bartender, sympathetically.

"I only wish it was that," answered Dave, "but it's much worse. The little bastard has got our 16-year-old baby sitter pregnant."

"That's impossible!" gasped the bartender.

"No it's not," said Dave. "The sneak went and stuck a pin in all my condoms."



A famous sex therapist was on the radio taking questions when a caller asked, "Doctor, I'd like to know why men always want to marry a virgin?"

To which the doctor handily replied, "No criticism!"



Five surgeons are having drinks together at a surgical convention and making jokes...

The first, a Florida surgeon, says: "I like to see accountants on my operating table, because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered."

The second, a Michigan surgeon, responds: "Yeah, but you should try electricians. Everything inside of them is color coded."

The third, a California surgeon, says: "No, I really think librarians are the best; everything inside of them is in alphabetical order."

The fourth, an New York surgeon, chimes in: "You know, I like construction workers. Those guys always understand when you have a few parts left over."

But the fifth, from Washington D.C. shut them all up when he observed, "You're all wrong. Politicians are the easiest to operate on. There's no guts, no heart, no balls, no brains, no spine, and the head and the ass are interchangeable."


Email TZ at: mailto:tz@gophercentral.com