Thursday, May 16, 2013

Greetings Laff Lovers,

I seriously do not know how these conversations get started, but Lewis and I were discussing the semantic difference between a whore and a slut.

"A slut is a woman who will sleep with anyone. A whore is a woman who will sleep with anyone but you!" Lewis quipped, trying to give the ancient gag some new life.

"You're putting too much thought into it," I chastised him. "Whores and sluts are the same thing. A whore is just a slut with a little business savvy."

Simply,

TZ

Send me comments, jokes and pictures of all the hot women in your family at this link: tz@gophercentral.com

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"Farmers in France have started giving their cows two bottles of wine every day, in order to make better beef. Unfortunately, all the cows wind up doing is texting their ex-milkers." -Jimmy Fallon



A wife says to her husband, "You're always pushing me around and talking behind my back."

He says, "What do you expect? You're in a wheel chair!"



"China announced it will no longer buy recycled trash from the U.S. I don't have a joke here. I'd just like to give a round of applause to whatever genius has been selling trash to China." -Conan O'Brien



"Have you ever seen Twenty Dollars all crumpled up?" the woman asked her husband.

"No"...said her husband.

She gave him a sexy little smile, unbuttoned the top 3 buttons of her blouse...and slowly reached down into the cleavage created by a soft, silky push-up bra...and pulled out a crumpled Twenty Dollar bill.

He took the crumpled Twenty Dollar bill from her ...and smiled approvingly.

"Have you ever seen Fifty Dollars all crumpled up?" she then asked her husband?

"Uh...no, I haven't" he said with an anxious tone in his voice.

She gave him another sexy little smile, pulled up her skirt, and seductively reached into her tight, sheer panties and pulled out a crumpled Fifty Dollar bill.

He took the crumpled Fifty Dollar bill... and started breathing a little quicker with anticipation.

"Now," she said, "Have you ever seen $50,000 Dollars all crumpled up?"

"No way" ...he said (while obviously becoming even more aroused... and excited).

"Well go look in the garage!"