Monday, March 24, 2014

Greetings Laff Lovers,

I was walking into the office this morning when I saw a rather solidly-built, middle-aged woman struggling through the front door of the building, obviously in a hurry.

So taking pity on her I held the door open until she could get through the lobby and make it to the elevator.

"Oh, thank you!" she said breathlessly. "It's so nice to see men are still willing to do a favor for a lady."

"No problem," I answered. "Chivalry isn't dead yet."

She grunted at me, "If it isn't then it's nearly dead. These days it seems you can't get a man's attention unless you're showing off huge boobs."

"Don't be too jealous," I said, "my wife has big tits and I usually ignore her."

Consolingly,

TZ

Send me comments, jokes and pictures of all the hot women in your family at this link: tz@gophercentral.com

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"Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg criticized the NSA and called the government a threat to the Internet. Then he went back to running a website where you list everyone you've ever met, every place you've been, every place you're going, what you had eat, your ex-girlfriends and your ex-boyfriends, which bands you like..." -Jimmy Fallon



I was talking to a friend of mine, and he told me that he's been married a little over four years. He told me he was celebrating his 'Wooden' anniversary.

I asked what a 'wooden' anniversary was.

He said, "I asked her to give me a blow job and she wooden."



"The brassiere turns 100 years old this week. And so does everyone who still calls it a brassiere." -Seth Meyers



A Greek and Italian were sitting in a Starbuck's one day discussing who had the superior culture. Over triple lattes the Greek guy says, "Well, we have the Parthenon."

Arching his eyebrows, the Italian replies, "We have the Coliseum."

The Greek retorts, "We Greeks gave birth to advanced mathematics."

The Italian, nodding agreement, says, "But we built the Roman Empire."

And so on and so on until the Greek comes up with what he thinks will end the discussion.

With a flourish of finality he says, "We invented sex!"

The Italian replies, "That is true, but it was the Italians who introduced it to women!"