Monday, September 2, 2013

Greetings Laff Lovers,

I walked into the house early Friday afternoon after cutting out of the office early, and my wife hugged and kissed me.

"Oh, you're home early! How about if we get the stuff we need to put up the shelves I've been waiting for?"

"Not really in the mood to spend my hooky afternoon putting up shelves."

"OK, how about we go have a late lunch?"

"Sorry, Babe, I just ate."

"Well then, let's go to the mall and get gifts for the girl's birthdays?

"Why don't we just go upstairs and I'll show you what a choir of angels singing feels like?"

She kissed me again. "Oh, Honey, I can't. It's that time of the month."

"Don't sweat it. I'm goin' golfing anyway. I just came to change, but you're in such a good mood I thought I could get a hole-in-one before even getting to the course."

Closest-to-the-hole-ly,

TZ

Send me comments, jokes and pictures of all the hot women in your family at this link: tz@gophercentral.com

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"Wal-Mart will soon begin offering benefits for their employees' same-sex partners. How about that? Finally a company looking out for the interests of gay and lesbian Chinese factory workers!" -Jay Leno



Science magazine came out with a report on the difference between men and women's brains.

Apparently women are more controlled by a part of the brain called singletgyrus.

Men are more controlled by a part of the brain known as the penis.



Two guys are at the bar staring into their drinks, when one says, "Hey Harry, have you ever suspected your wife of leading a double life?"

Harry says, "Yeah, all the time--her own and mine."



A white guy was having trouble satisfying his wife, so he went to his black buddy at work for advice.

"Listen," said the inept white guy, "I know you soul brothers always satisfy your women. How do you do it?"

"Oh, dat ain't no problem," said his friend. "What I does is stick it in 'em real slow, and then pull it out from 'em real fast. Keep doin' that and dey come every time."

The white guy went home that night and tried his friend's technique out. He stuck it in real slow, and then pulled it out real fast, just like his buddy said. After a while he asked his wife, "Honey, do notice anything different about the way I'm doing it?"

"Yeah," she said, "you're screwing just like black guy."