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Sunday, January 31, 2016

Greetings Laff Lovers,

I just read that on average, an adult U.S. male will have sex two to three times a week, whereas a Japanese man will have sex only one or two times a year.

This is very upsetting news to me, as I had no idea I was Japanese!


T(etsuo) Z(enshin)

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"A Canadian engineer designed a plane that can fly passengers from New York to London in 11 minutes using a new technology called LPM or long penetration mode. I'm not sure which airline will buy the plane, but I think we can rule out Virgin." -Jimmy Fallon

It is hard being black. We get the bad end of the deal with every sport. Hockey your slappin' a black puck around. Pool you have a white ball trying to knock you in a hole. The only thing we have is bowling, where you have a black ball trying to knock down a bunch of rednecks.

"Dennis Hof, the owner of Nevada's famous Bunny Ranch Brothel, has announced he will run for Senate in 2016. Even though the only experience he has with politicians is telling them to 'come back soon!" -Seth Meyers

Professor Higgins at the University of Sydney was giving a lecture on 'Involuntary Muscle Contraction' to the first year medical students.

This was not an exciting subject and the professor decided to lighten up the mood.

He pointed to a young woman in the front row and asked, "Do you know what your asshole is doing while you're having an orgasm?"

She replied, "Probably golfing with his buddies."

It took 5 minutes to restore order in the classroom.

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