Monday, August 23, 2010
Greetings Laff Lovers,
I walked into the house early Friday afternoon after cutting
out of the office early, and my wife hugged and kissed me.
"Oh, you're home early! How about if we get the stuff we need
to put up the shelves I've been waiting for?"
"Not really in the mood to spend my hooky afternoon putting
up shelves."
"OK, how about we go have a late lunch?"
"Sorry, Babe, I just ate."
"Well then, let's go to the mall and get gifts for the girl's
birthdays next week?
"Why don't we just go upstairs and I'll show you what a choir
of angels singing looks like?"
She kissed me again. "Oh, Honey, I can't. It's that time of
the month."
"Don't sweat it. I'm goin' golfing anyway. I just came to
change, but you're so happy I thought I could get a hole in
one before even getting to the course."
Closest-to-the-hole-ly,
TZ
Send me comments, jokes and pictures of all the hot women in
your family at this link: mailto:tz@gophercentral.com
OH Yeah...Well, Take THAT Martha Stewart
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"Lindsay Lohan will supposedly get a million dollars for
her first interview after prison. I need to start driving
drunk into houses." -Jimmy Kimmel
Dear Abby,
My Fiance refuses to let me have a bachelor party unless
she is there. I want to have all the fun my friends have,
but she is standing in the way. Please help me find a
solution to this problem.
Thankfully,
Going Down The Aisle
Dear Pussy Whipped,
Buy the bitch a pole and tell her to learn how to dance.
Abby
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Paul was ambling through a crowded street fair when he decided
to stop and sit at a Palm Reader's table. Said the mysterious
old woman, "For fifteen dollars, I can read your love line and
tell your romantic future."
Paul readily agreed and the reader took one look at his open
palm and said, "I can see that you have no girlfriend."
"That's true," said Paul.
"Oh my goodness, you are extremely lonely, aren't you?"
"Yes," Paul shamefully admitted. "That's amazing. Can you tell
all of this from my love line?"
"Love line? No, from the calluses."
Email TZ at: mailto:tz@laffaday.com