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| There are two things you can trust in this world. |
| I finally figured out what my problem is. |
| Fighting inflation with smarts. |
| Let's consider women who don't shave their armpits. |
| The best reason I've ever heard not to work late. |
| The best of both worlds. |
| Speaking of switching roles. |
| There's canceled and then there's canceled. |
| Kids never know what's good for them. |
| The new gender inclusive and non-sexist language guide. |
| There is one thing I have learned for certain. |
| It's about time I start collecting. |
| I've got a battery for you. |
| I really have to reevaluate my life. |
| It doesn't get much scarier than that. |
| Here's one from the 'Yeah, duh' department. |
| Do you ever feel like your life is trickling away? |
| The death of mascots and 'THE MAN TEST' |
| Screw Americans. |
| A worse verse. |
| The 12 signs of depression in men. |
| I've got a mandate for ya'. |
| What two groups of people really dig lesb!anz. |
| I like my steaks like I like my women. |
| Mrs. Clean. |
| Looks like we're back at it. |
| Men make better women than women. |
| 'Screw your freedom.' |
| It pays to multi-task. |
| I need to watch my @__ around here. |
| I've got better things to do with my thumbs. |
| She treats me like a god. |
| Thus Spake Zarathustra |
| Ashes to ashes. |
| You're an accessory. |
| I'm afraid you're going read about me in the news. |
| There are always 2 sides to every coin. |
| Not the Hero I deserve, but the Hero I need. |
| It may not be a dumbbell, but it's still a lot to lift. |
| The proper way to spend Independence Day. |
| I could never be unfaithful to my wife. |
| TZ's killer beer bratwurst recipe. |
| Hot fun in the summertime. |
| One night stands maybe over in the morning but... |
| Introducing the Junior Spies. |
| Anything can happen. |
| I love it when the weather warms up. |
| Variety is the spice of life. |
| You're paying - one way or another. |
| Cheeseburgers and sausages. |
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