Thursday, April 19, 2018
Greetings Laff Lovers,
I ran into one of the customer service girls (ladies, really) in the office kitchen this morning making herself a cup of coffee.
"How are you doing today?" I asked her pleasantly.
"Oh, just living the dream," she replied.
"Going that well, huh? I'm glad to hear it."
She looked me dead in the eye and answered, "Who said it was a good dream?"
I was about to make a joke about it, but something in her expression made me think she wasn't kidding. The poor girl.
So if you're feeling in a generous mood go to our web page at www.pulsetv.com
and call the customer service department to let them know that life is beautiful and it's getting better all the time.
Send me comments, jokes and pictures of all the hot women in your family at this link: email@example.com
P.S. Did you miss an issue? You can read every issue from the Gophercentral library of newsletters on our exhaustive archives page. Thousands of issues, all of your favorite publications in chronological order. You can read AND comment. Just click GopherArchives
"The city of Anchorage, Alaska, has voted down a bathroom bill that discriminates against transgendered people. Residents said, 'You know, it's so cold here in Alaska we can't tell what genitals you have anyway.'" -Conan O'Brien
I was talking to a friend of mine, and he told me that he's been married a little over four years. He told me he was celebrating his 'Wooden' anniversary.
I asked what a 'wooden' anniversary was.
He said, "I asked her to give me a blow job and she wooden."
"A former Playboy bunny just became the oldest lingerie model at 83 years old. When asked why she went back to work, she said, 'My Trump hush money ran out.'" -Jimmy Fallon
The mother-in-law arrives home from the shops to find her son-in-law, Paddy, in a steaming rage and hurriedly packing his suitcase.
"What happened Paddy?" she asks anxiously.
"What happened! I'll tell you what happened. I sent an email to my wife telling her I was coming home today from my fishing trip. I get home and guess what I found? Yes, your daughter, my wife Jean, naked with Joe Murphy in our marital bed! This is unforgivable, the end of our marriage. I'm done. I'm leaving forever!"
"Ah now, calm down, calm down, Paddy!" says his mother-in-law. "There is something very odd going on here. Jean would never do such a thing! There must be a simple explanation. I'll go speak to her immediately and find out what happened."
Minutes later, the mother-in-law comes back with a big smile.
"Paddy. I told you there must be a simple explanation... she never got your email!"