Monday, February 26, 2018
Good morning crew,
It seems like spring is threatening to make an early arrival around here, with the mountains of snow from last week almost gone and temperatures edging into the 50s. But I know better. We're going to have at least one more snow storm before this winter is over.
It just better do it before March 20 or I'm going to look real foolish.
Laugh it up,
Joe
joe@gophercentral.com
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"A new study from the University of Sussex found that horses can recognize human emotions based on our facial expressions. Yet another reason you should never play poker with a horse -- and they never pitch in for the pizza." -Stephen Colbert
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"Starbucks is going to start carrying coconut milk. If you want to stay competitive in the coffee business you've got to consistently provide your customers with new ways to make their orders more annoying." -Jimmy Kimmel
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"Researchers say much of Florida could be underwater by the end of the century. On the bright side, they say it could happen much sooner." -Conan O'Brien
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My 10-year-old daughter has decided she is an environmentalist. So she talked me into participating in an aggressive recycling effort with her.
Last week she and I took what proved to be 134 pounds of cardboard boxes to the recycling center and earned $1.34. Counting gas and ice cream, we turned a profit of -$7.85.
We're going to use generally accepted accounting principles and see if we can apply this amount to our taxable income.
*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes --------------*
A small boy stunned his parents after church one Sunday when he began to empty his pockets of nickels, dimes, and quarters.
Finally his mother asked the obvious question: "Where did you get all that money?"
"At Sunday school," the boy replied enthusiastically. "They got bowls of it!"