Monday, February 19, 2018
Good morning crew,
My tax appointment last Friday went pretty much as expected; for the first time I have to write the government a check.
You know, ol' Mason said to me once, "You don't live to work, you work to live." Which is true, but it goes both ways.
Well, there's a solution to every problem. Lots of people have three jobs these days.
Laugh it up,
P.S. Did you miss an issue? You can read every issue from the Gophercentral library of newsletters on our exhaustive archives page. Thousands of issues, all of your favorite publications in chronological order. You can read AND comment. Just click GopherArchives
"A cellist in Oregon was arrested after police found over 100 pounds of marijuana in his car trunk. Thankfully, when they pulled him over, he didn't resort to violins." -Seth Meyers
"Valentine's Day: the day women all around the world wait eagerly to discover the new and wonderful ways their husbands and boyfriends will disappoint them." -Jimmy Kimmel
"Two hundred cows recently died in a field in Wisconsin. Nobody knows the cause of death, but they suspect boredom." -Conan O'Brien
A young mother was standing outside a mall holding her six- month-old baby and her sister's three-month-old baby.
Two women approached the mother. "Are they twins?" one asked.
"No, they're three months apart."
"My! You sure had them close together."
*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes --------------*
Two older, successful businessmen met at a resort. One who had recently retired was describing his life, "I get up late in the morning, have a light breakfast and then I lie down on my veranda for a few hours and relax.
In the afternoon I go inside for lunch, have a great salad, fruits and cold fish, then I spend the rest of the afternoon boating or playing golf or tennis...
When it starts to get dark I have a great dinner with the finest wines. I smoke a Cuban cigar. Then I go lie on my veranda again."
The other gentleman acknowledges that this is a life to be envied. Later he reported the conversation to his wife. She asked, "What's his wife's name?"
Her husband said, "I'm not sure, but I think it's Veranda."