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Friday, February 2, 2018

Good morning crew,

Wow. Not only is today Groundhog Day, it's also a Friday. How long has it been since that's happened? You know what that means...

Groundhog Day party!

All I need to do is figure out where I can buy a groundhog costume and some groundhog burgers. I suppose I could make the food myself. All I'd need is some ground hog.

Laugh it up,

Joe

joe@gophercentral.com

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"After Trump's State of the Union speech, Massachusetts Congressman Joe Kennedy became one of the youngest people to give the Democratic response. And you could tell he was young when all he said was, 'He cray.'" -Jimmy Fallon

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"Google has a new service called 'Flights' that is now able to predict flight delays. How it works is, if you're flying United, your flight's delayed." -Conan O'Brien

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"Police in Philadelphia have announced they will not grease light poles ahead of the Super Bowl because the grease did not deter people from climbing poles following the NFC championship game. In fact, all it did was made them impossible to arrest." -Seth Meyers

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On my 40th birthday I waltzed out of my bedroom dressed in an old outfit I dug out of the back of the closet.

"I wore this on my 30th birthday! I guess that means my wardrobe is ten years old," I said to my husband, hoping he'd take the hint and buy me some clothes as a present.

"Or," he offered instead, "it means when you were 30 you had the body of a 40-year-old."




*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes --------------*

Mom and Dad were trying to console Susie, whose dog Skipper had recently died.

"You know," Mom said, "it's not so bad. Skipper's probably up in Heaven right now, having a grand old time with God."

Susie stopped crying and asked, "What would God want with a dead dog?"

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