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MOUTHPIECE - January 9, 2018

Good Afternoon,


Today's issue is all about things that I really need to do. For instance... find some gold, learn a few interesting character facts, and do some laundry.

I think that last one is going to help out a lot of people. And, hey, who couldn't use a little gold?

Fun awaits!

Mouthing Off,
Carl


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[m] q u o t e s . o f . t h e . d a y

"Any fool can make a rule, and any fool will mind it."
--Henry David Thoreau

"To play it safe is not to play."
--Robert Altman

"My mother buried three husbands, and two of them were just napping."
--Rita Rudner



[m] What's On the Web?

Goldminer Game

Explore caves for gold, diamonds, and other valuables. Build up a fortune while avoiding obstacles. This game is so much fun, it's worth its weight in gold!

Visit: Goldminer Game


32 Amazing Character Facts To Break Out At Parties

Looking for more useless, but fascinating knowledge to fill your noggin' with? Look no further...

Visit: 32 Amazing Character Facts To Break Out At Parties



[m] b i t s . n . b o b s

*-- The Top 10 Signs That It's Time To Do The Laundry --*

1. You're wearing your last pair of underwear in the shower consistently.

2. You've worn your sheets to school because you can't get them off of you.

3. Your socks act like a shirt does when its heavily starched and emit a serious funk.

4. Your roommate walks around wearing a full body medical suit like they did in the movie "Outbreak" to avoid catching the Ebola virus.

5. The Snuggle Bear on the softener bottle officially died last week.

6. The DEA's drug sniffing dog is always coming by to sniff your laundry because the strong stench makes him think you have 28 tons of pot in your closet.

7. Even after sewing 28 spring scented dryer sheets to the inside of your shirt, your friends still say you reek.

8. The phrase "Wash Me" is visibly written in your jeans.

9. Your red T-shirt is now green.

10. The boss pulls you aside to remind you that your company's casual days does not include your college graduation gown and scuba diving fins.

***

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