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MOUTHPIECE - December 19, 2017

Good Afternoon,


I really hope the holiday finds you well. I'll keep things brief and then I'll see you next week!

Now, enjoy today's holiday themed issue. Great quotes, fun games and a hilarious joke list that will surely help to enhance your holiday spirit!

Happy Holidays!

Mouthing Off,
Carl


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[m] q u o t e s . o f . t h e . d a y

"Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city."
--George Burns

"If you cannot get rid of the family skeleton, you may as well make it dance."
--George Bernard Shaw

"A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold."
--Ogden Nash



[m] What's On the Web?

Christmas Friends

Elf's are happy when they're connected to their friends. Move the Elf's around to connect their hands and make them happy.

Visit: Christmas Friends


Christmas Maze Game

Can you help the Reindeer get to Santa in time for Christmas? Put your cursor over the deer and travel down to Santa. Don't hit anything, if you do, you will have to start over.

Visit: Christmas Maze Game



[m] b i t s . n . b o b s

*-- Santa Hates Your Kid --*

8. Kid's letter to north pole comes back stamped, "Dream on, Chester!"

7. Kid asks for new bike, gets pack of smokes.

6. Along with presents, Santa leaves hefty bill for shipping and handling.

5. By the time he gets to your house, all he has left is foam packing.

4. Christmas day, your kid wakes up with a Reindeer head in his bed.

3. Instead of "Naughty" or "Nice", Santa has him on the stupid list.

2. Labels on all your kid's toys read "Straight from Craptown."

1. Four words: "Off my lap, Tubby!"

***

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