December 04, 2017

Good Morning Groanies,

I waste so much energy. It's always with little things too. For instance, I was grocery shopping the other day and while I was at the deli counter I asked to get a 3/4 lb. of American Cheese. The very nice lady behind the counter asked me, "How do you want the cheese sliced?"

This is the point where my brain kicked into overdrive and I began to think of clever responses to the aforementioned question. Things like - "With your feet," "As slow as possible," "How can you ask me such a thing? I hardly know you," "With a karate chop", "Haven't you cut the cheese before?" and "How dare you cut cheese before me!" You know, the classics!

I became so distracted by my own thoughts of absolute lunacy that I total forgot that I had cheese coming to me and simply walked away from the counter.

Hey, that wasn't as bad as later on when I left the cart full of groceries because I suddenly felt the urge to chase after a squirrel I saw. So I got problems. Who doesn't?

Groaningly yours,
Steve

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Jokes? Comments? Questions? Email Steve

*-- Q and A Quickies --*

Q: What is a pretzel's favorite dance?

A: The Twist!


Q: What's the best thing to put into a pie?

A: Your teeth!

*-- Give 'Em Some Sugar --*

Bob: One of our pigs was sick so I gave him some sugar.

Doug: Sugar! What for?

Bob: Haven't you ever heard of sugar-cured ham?

*-- More Q and A Quickies --*

Q: How to you organize a space party?

A: You planet.


Q: Why did the penny jump off the cliff but not the nickel?

A: Because the nickel had more cents.