GopherCentral.com Powered By PulseTV.com
November 06, 2017

Good Morning Groanies,

10dollarsI hate being sick! I especially hate that feeling you get like you're lost in a fog. Your vision is cloudy. Your ears feel like they're packed with cotton balls. It's the worst.

Then there are those times when you realize that all you need to do is clean your glasses and cotton swabs your hear holes. Such an easy fix.

I, however, am sick. Very sick. I'm so sick in fact that when the doctor examined me she let out an audible, "Ewww!" I've always had that kind of effect on women.

Now I have medication, cough drops, tissues, water bottle, electric blanket, and I've been watching Grey's Anatomy non-stop since my doctor visit. Hey, whatever works.

I am currently on the road to recovery... or Rochester. Like I said, my vision's a bit foggy.

Groaningly yours,
Steve


P.S. Did you miss an issue? You can read every issue from the Gophercentral library of newsletters on our exhaustive archives page. Thousands of issues, all of your favorite publications in chronological order. You can read AND comment. Just click GopherArchives

Jokes? Comments? Questions? Email Steve

*-- Preparing For Landing --*

On the first day of training for parachute jumping, a blonde listened intently to the instructor. He told them to start preparing for landing when they are at 300 feet.

The blonde asked, "How am I supposed to know when I'm at 300 feet?"

"That's a good question. When you get to 300 feet, you can recognize the faces of people on the ground."

After pondering his answer, she asked, "What happens if there's no one there I know?"
Learn more about RevenueStripe...

*-- The Job Interview --*

Human Resources Manager: "What is your greatest weakness?"

Old man: "Honesty."

Human Resources Manager: "I don't think honesty is a weakness."

Old Man: "I don't really give a crap what you think."
Learn more about RevenueStripe...

*-- Q and A Quickies --*

Q: What do postal workers do when they're mad?

A: They stamp their feet.


Q: Why are basketball courts always so damp?

A: The players dribble a lot.

Top Viewed Issues