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Saturday, October 7, 2017

Greetings fellow Bizarros:

A woman who could not afford meals at restaurants, put glass in her food and cut her lips to avoid paying for meals, according to police in Florida.

Stuart Police Department said that they have arrested 31-year-old Kaitlyn Murphy, after being accused of defrauding at least 11 restaurants in recent weeks.

According to the police investigation, Murphy carried glass in her purse and used it to put in her food while eating at restaurants. She also cut her lips before telling the managers that she found glass in the food.

The establishments canceled her charge and allowed her to eat for free. Some establishments even provided her with free vouchers.

Her crime came to light when one restaurant posted Murphy's story on their Facebook page. Other restaurant managers then posted comments that they had similar stories recently.

During questioning, Murphy told police that she did this because she could not afford the meals.

She was booked at the Martin County Jail, and her bail has been set at $5,000.


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*------------ How's That For Luck? ------------*

Charles Svatos of Iowa City is just the third Iowan to win the 'Lucky for Life' for life drawing which entitled him to $25,000 per year for life. Charles is 92-years-old. Players can win Lucky for Life's top prize of $1,000 a day for life by matching all six numbers selected in one of its drawings. The game's second prize - for matching the first five numbers but missing the Lucky Ball - is $25,000 a year for life. Oddly enough, Svatos said he bought a fortune cookie last month at a casino that said, "You will discover an unexpected treasure." Probably wisely Svatos chose to receive his prize as a lump sum of $390,000, which he plans to use to travel. His winnings ended up being $273,000 after taxes.


*------------------ Iron Man ------------------*

Surgeons have removed more than 100 pieces of metal from a French man's stomach, including knives, nails and screws. The 52-year-old man with chronic psychosis first presented with a gastric obstruction due to swallowing metal items in 2012. Although he was receiving treatment for his mental health he still had a tendency to swallow metal objects. The obstruction was removed endoscopically - using a flexible tube that is fed along his digestive tract - and the man was sent home. Eight months later the man was readmitted with the same symptoms. This time he was operated on to remove all of the metal pieces. Medics found nails, knifes, screws, nuts, spoon handles, a screwdriver head, washer, pebbles, coins and iron wire inside the man.

*-------------- READER COMMENTS --------------*

I keep ordering yoga mats, but still haven't gotten any pills! Damn it. -Jim

LEWIS; This 'How Do You Like Me Now?' story about the man who wanted to look cool in the eyes of his girlfriend, stole his uncle's police uniform and cruiser reminds me about the doofus who went to audition for CATS on Broadway in a rented cop uniform to try out for the role of Officer Dibble. -R.S.

What's with this asshole who broke into a house just to hang out with a woman? Hasn't he ever heard of Internet porn? Sheesh, some people.

*----------- END OF READER COMMENTS ----------*