Subscibe to DEAL OF THE DAY

September 13, 2017

Good Morning Groanies,

10dollarsI don't think that the pants I'm currently wearing are not my pants.

I don't know who's pants they are or where they came from. Maybe the wallet in the back pocket could be the very clue which will reveal the true owner of these pants. Hey, that is my wallet! These are my pants!

Sorry, false alarm. That was weird. I haven't been sleeping very well.

Groaningly yours,

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Jokes? Comments? Questions? Email Steve

*-- Ouch, My Arm Hurts! --*

A man went to visit his doctor. "Doctor, my arm hurts bad. Can you check it out please?" the man pleads. The doctor rolls up the man's sleeve and suddenly hears the arm talk.

"Hello Doctor, could you lend me twenty bucks please? I'm desperate" the arm says.

The doctor says, "Aha! I see the problem... Your arm is broke!"
Learn more about RevenueStripe...

*-- Was He Dead? --*

In a murder trial, the defense attorney was cross-examining the coroner.

Attorney: Before you signed the death certificate, had you taken the pulse?

Coroner: No.

Attorney: Did you listen to the heart?

Coroner: No.

Attorney: Did you check for breathing?

Coroner: No.

Attorney: So, when you signed the death certificate, you weren't sure the man was dead, were you?

Coroner: Well, let me put it this way. The man's brain was sitting in a jar on my desk. But I guess it's possible he could be out there practicing law somewhere.
Learn more about RevenueStripe...

*-- Q and A Quickies --*

Q: What did the mother skunk say to her teenage skunk?

A: Don't stink and drive.

Q: Why did the farmer feed his sheep iron-enriched vitamins?

A: He wanted to get steel wool.