Saturday, August 26, 2017
Greetings fellow Bizarros:
The guy in last week's Bizarre News who stopped in the middle of a burglary to watch the eclipse was an amateur compared to this pimp.
Police in Florida, have released a video, showing a wanted thief engaging in sex acts with a woman during a burglary.
The incident unfolded at around 9:15 p.m., in the parking lot of Twin Lakes Pool and BBQ in Cooper City. The suspect was seen on surveillance video backing a truck into the parking lot.
According to detectives, before he stole the trailer, the suspect "dived into some adult behavior with a companion." In the video, the man was seen standing at the door of the vehicle while the woman was performing sex acts on him.
Once that deed was done, the man was seen pulling his pants up and walking towards the trailer.
He removed the trailer from the fence on which it was chained, and hooked it up to his pickup. The man then drove away with the $1,200 trailer.
Police said that the male thief wore a baseball cap, long sleeve shirt and a shit-eating grin. He was driving a silver two-door pickup with a retractable bed cover.
P.S. Did you miss an issue? You can read every issue from the Gophercentral library of newsletters on our exhaustive archives page. Thousands of issues, all of your favorite publications in chronological order. You can read AND comment. Click http://gopherarchives.gophercentral.com
Questions? Comments? Email: firstname.lastname@example.org
*- Waiter Draws Straight Line in the Ice Cream -*
A restaurant in Washington, has come under fire after a gay couple claimed that a waiter refused to serve them an ice cream with two spoons for them to share. 55-year-old Ron Gage and 58-year-old Henry McKinnon said they went to the Prime Rib restaurant to enjoy a romantic night out. They said that everything went fine until they asked for a single serving of ice cream with two spoons. The waiter's mood soured, and he refused to serve them the ice cream in a single serving, saying that it would not sit will with ambiance of the restaurant. Gage and McKinnon were speechless, and did not say anything to the waiter or the manager. The following day, the couple made their story public on social media sites after which James MacLeod, the manager of the Prime Rib restaurant, fired the waiter.
*------- The Clothes Make the Shop-Lifter -------*
Police in Louisiana released security camera footage of a shoplifter taking 18 bottles of wine and liquor from a store by shoving them in her clothes and purse. The security camera footage from the Thrifty Liquor Store in Shreveport shows a woman concealing 18 bottles of wine and liquor in her purse, pants and bra before paying for a single bottle of alcohol and leaving the store. The video, posted to YouTube by the Shreveport-Caddo Crime Stoppers, led to the Shreveport City Marshal's Office and Louisiana State Probation and Parole Office identifying the woman in the footage as Sekonie Jones, 37. Jones was contacted by investigators and surrendered. She was arrested on a count of misdemeanor theft.
*-------------- READER COMMENTS --------------*
I've never done ecstasy, but if it's anything like a hallucinogen you have to be real careful about your environment when doing shit like that. One wrong impression could lead to a very bad trip. I'm not sure I would want my last impression before ingesting a drug to be Mr. Trump.
If you need money that badly that you have to steal an ATM with a forklift, why not just sell the forklift?
*----------- END OF READER COMMENTS ----------*