MOUTHPIECE - July 11, 2017

Good Afternoon,

You know when you ask someone a question, but you preface that question with, "Please, be completely honest," but then you're not?

I think that only works on first graders. And to prove my claim today's 'Bits N Bobs' section features the evidence in the form of a first grade class finishing well known proverbs.

The truth is always funnier.

Mouthing Off,
Carl

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[m] q u o t e s . o f . t h e . d a y
"You can't have everything. Where would you put it?"
--Steven Wright

"If life was fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead."
--Johnny Carson

"Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist ought to have his head examined."
--Samuel Goldwyn



[m] What's On the Web?
14 Epic Comebacks Stars Gave To Stupid Interview Questions
Don't talk to the press! And if you do, make sure that you have a great comeback at the ready for some of their lame, stupid and embarrassing questions. Here are 14 excellent examples!

Visit: 14 Epic Comebacks Stars Gave To Stupid Interview Questions


SHOE LACING METHODS
How many possible ways are there to lace an average shoe? If you are bored with the standard lace-up style you learned as a kid, this site has over twenty cool techniques for tying your shoes.

Visit: SHOE LACING METHODS



[m] b i t s . n . b o b s
*-- First Grader Proverbs --*
A first grade teacher collected well known proverbs. She gave each child in her class the first half of a proverb and asked them to come up with the remainder of the proverb.

* Better to be safe than...punch a 5th grader

* Strike while the...bug is close

* It's always darkest before...Daylight Savings Time

* Never underestimate the power of...termites

* You can lead a horse to water but...how?

* Don't bite the hand that...looks dirty

* No news is...impossible

* A miss is as good as a...Mr.

* You can't teach an old dog new............math

* If you lie down with dogs, you'll...stink in the morning

* Love all, trust...me

* The pen is mightier than the...pigs

* An idle mind is...The best way to relax

* Where there's smoke there's...pollution

* Happy the bride who...gets all the presents

* A penny saved is...not much

* Two's company, three's...the Musketeers

* Laugh and the whole world laughs with you, cry and...you have to blow your nose

* None are so blind as...Helen Keller

* Children should be seen and not...spanked or grounded

* You get out of something what you...see pictured on the box

* When the blind leadeth the blind...get out of the way

***
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