Thursday, June 29, 2017
Greetings Laff Lovers,
I was talking with an older friend of mine who has been struggling to come to terms with middle age.
"I'm really worried about myself," he said forlornly. "My memory has always been a source of quiet pride to me, but lately it's been failing me. I'm having a hard time remembering things from the mundane to the major."
"I wouldn't worry too much about it," I said consolingly, "sounds like you'll forget all about it tomorrow."
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"The only gracious way to accept an insult is to ignore it; if you can't ignore it, top it; if you can't top it, laugh at it; if you can't laugh at it, it's probably deserved." --Russell Lynes
"Are you all right?" my seatmate on the plane asked, after noticing tears roll down my cheeks.
"I'm flying my husband's ashes to Michigan for burial," I explained, "and it just struck me that this will be our last trip together."
"I know how you feel," she said. "I had my horse for 20 years and just put him to sleep last week."
"A new book about why women have sex claims that women's reasons differ from pleasure to obligation to even 'feeling sorry for the guy.' After hearing this, men everywhere said, 'Whatever...'" -Conan O'Brien
One day Steve's mom was cleaning his room. In the closet, she found a bondage S&M magazine.
This was highly upsetting to her.
She hid the magazine until his father got home.
When Steve's father walked in the door, she irately handed the magazine to him, and said, "THIS is what I found in your son's closet."
He looked at it and handed it back to her without a word.
After an uncomfortable minute of silence she finally asked him, "Well, what should we do about this?"
Dad looked at her and said, "Well I DON'T think we should spank him."