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Saturday, April 8, 2017

Greetings fellow Bizarros:

What the hell is going on in India? If you ever thought Rudyard Kipling was full of shit, then you owe his corpse an appology, because a little girl was just discovered in a forest in northern India living with a troop of monkeys.

The girl is estimated to be between eight and 10-years-old. Doctors said she could not communicate and displayed "monkey-like" traits.

The little girl was spotted by villagers in the Katarniaghat wildlife sanctuary, on the Indian border with Nepal. A senior police official told BBC Hindi she had been playing with a pack of monkeys and imitating their behaviour when police went to rescue her. The police official, Suresh Yadav, said the monkeys attacked his squad when they arrived to take her away.

Doctors said she was malnourished when she was brought in, with long hair and nails, and wounds on her body. She was also unable to communicate but would screech and initially walked on all fours.

Her condition is said to be much better now, however, and in the long term she is expected to be handed over to child welfare agencies and other medical specialists to slowly reintroduce her to the world.

It is not clear, however, how long the little girl has been living in the forest.


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*-- The Wrong Time and Place to Buy Lingerie --*

A woman shot her love rival who was shopping for sexy lingerie at Victoria's Secret, according to police in Ohio. Columbus police said that they have arrested 22-year-old Anikqua A.E. Williams, after being accused of shooting 23-year-old Daneshia Elmore. According to the police investigation, Williams and Elmore were fighting over a man for more than a year. When Williams saw that Elmore was buying sexy lingerie at a Victoria's Secret Pink store, apparently to entice her boyfriend, she pulled out a gun. Williams then shot Elmore in the chest. Elmore was rushed to the OhioHealth Grant Medical Center, where she is said to be in stable condition.


*----- Those Chinese Know How to Have Fun -----*

A Chinese zoo is making some extra cash and promoting education by charging guests $145 for the privilege of cleaning up polar bear poop. The Wuhan Haichang Ocean Park in Hubei province is offering a service once a week to adult guests interested in spending three hours experiencing the life of a polar bear keeper. The guests, who must undergo health checks and attend a short training session prior to their shifts, are given the opportunity to prepare food and feed the bears, but their main duties involve cleaning up the bear's doodies. "It really costs money to smell poop, but it's quite funny," Li Fengfan, 26, a zoo guest who recently took the polar bear experience, told China News Service. "It's hard to see polar bears, not to mention come into close contact with them." Park spokesperson Chen Ting said the goal of the program is education. "It's the first time the park has had a program targeting adults," Chen said. "It is a pilot to popularize science and knowledge of the animal for the public good, not for money. We actually don't want too many participants as that would disturb them."

*-------------- READER COMMENTS --------------*

J.C. reminds me of the consulting job I had at one point. Every day someone looked at my work and I was told all men are stupid. I just thought, "If I am getting paid four times as much as you for doing your job and rescued this expensive project, who is the stupid one again?" -John

Concerning the woman who can stop fan blades with her tongue and her husband who can pull weights with his eye sockets. I've always wondered, how do people discover they can do things like that? I believe that most people would not even try doing stuff like that. WV Dave
[It's called alcohol, Dave.]

*----------- END OF READER COMMENTS ----------*

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